Softly She Sighed

On the Cusp

2010-08-26T15:08:00.002+10:00

On the cusp of a new life, is it customary to be feeling so...

uninspired?

Bitter Sentimentality

2010-08-26T15:05:00.002+10:00

Lazy day, while away
The time that passes
Like the way
You withdraw from me
Further and further every day.

Bitter sighs.
Down lows.
I reach for those times.
But off we go.

Life is like a merry-go-round
Only we can't get off
We can't go back
And we can never
slow it down.

Greyson Chance

2010-05-27T02:27:00.000+10:00

Some of the comments are so amusing.

PeeWeeChic1
The girls in the back are like "♥_♥....What miracle did we just witness?"

kaszanka22
he is before his voice mutation... but he is talented we cant say he is not ;)

Um... voice... mutation? LOL.

Lost Without You

2010-05-26T02:13:00.001+10:00

I had almost forgotten how much I loved Savage Garden and Darren's incredible voice.

Cute Excuse

2010-05-26T02:10:00.001+10:00

Haven't had much to say lately, so I'll leave you with this little gem courtesy of Fuchsia Dunlop again.

--

I was just looking through one of my notebooks, and found a rather endearing story. It was in Ningbo, at the end of a fabulous dinner that had involved, among other things, divine little octopi (served whole), crunchy jellyfish, salted raw crab, white shrimps and red-braised pork with sea moss, and the chef was telling us all about a culinary conference he’d attended in a nearby city. ‘You know, everyone at the conference agreed [he sighed as he said this] that Western science was very advanced and developed, but that Western food didn’t amount to much. Whereas China might not have such advanced science, but the Chinese had really moved their brains 动了脑筋 when it came to food.’

It’s not the first time I’ve heard Chinese people blaming gastronomy for their country’s decline in the nineteenth and twentieth centuries*, but I loved the way he expressed it!

*In my ‘Shark’s Fin’ book I think I mentioned the Xi’an taxi driver who picked me up from the Banpo Neolithic village, and who moaned on the way back into town about the fact that the Chinese had invented steaming in the Stone Age, but had only applied it to cooking, leaving it to the British, many centuries later, to invent the steam engine.

Food, Life, Politics

2010-05-09T02:29:00.000+10:00

Reposted from Fuschia Dunlop's. Food metaphors, what's not to love?

In the same vein, read The Last Chinese Chef?

--

It’s funny how the UK’s weird and inconclusive general election result has brought out the food metaphors! The Mayor of London, Boris Johnson, spoke of a future coalition government as a sausage, in which the meat should be Conservative. And the BBC’s political reporter said on the radio at lunchtime that any government proposed by our current prime minister, Gordon Brown, would be a difficult cake to mix, because it would have to involve too many ingredients!

It reminded me of that age-old Chinese metaphor for the juggling of rival political interests: the seasoning of a stew (or, to be precise, a geng 羹, which is a kind of soup that is thick with cut ingredients - as opposed to a tang 汤, which is a lighter, more soupy type of soup). As David Knechtges says in a fascinating essay on this*: ‘In the Chinese classics, the proper seasoning of food is a common analogy for good government… The comparison of the perfectly blended stew with the art of good government is a commonplace both in ancient and later literature.’

The best known of Chinese culinary-political allegories is the lecture given by the legendary cook Yi Yin 伊尹 to his king in the sixteenth century BC (as recorded in ‘The Root of Tastes’ 本味篇, an essay by the merchant Lu Buwei that dates back to the third century BC). This is an extract from it, as published in my ‘Shark’s Fin’ book:

‘Harmonious blending depends on the sweet, the sour, the bitter, the pungent and the salty. But as to when each is added and in what quantity, this is a matter of extremely subtle balancing, for each has its own effect. The transformations that occur in the ding [cooking pot or cauldron] are so supremely wonderful and delicate that the mouth cannot express them in words, nor the mind comprehend them. They are like the fine-tuned skills of the archer and the charioteer, the fluctuations of yin and yang, the passing of the seasons.’

I wonder kind of stew we’ll end up with in Britain? Which of the main party leaders (if any) is the sweet ingredients? Which the sour, the bitter, the pungent or the salty? And which of them is the better cook, in political terms? Might we end up with a final sprinkling of green spring onion in the form of a Green Party MP? Let’s hope it’s a harmonious stew, anyway, given that it has to fortify us for a very bumpy road ahead…

*’A Literary Feast: Food in Early Chinese Literature’, by David R. Knechtges, published in Journal of the American Oriental Society, Vol. 106 No. 1, pp46-63, Jan-Mar 1986

Seven ways to guard and repair our friendships

2010-05-08T02:26:00.001+10:00

Reposted from Vinsant's.

--

1. We can rejoice in one another, because the Lord rejoices in us.

2. We can create an environment of trust rather than negative scrutiny.

3. We can judge ourselves, even as we give each other the benefit of the doubt.

4. If a problem must be addressed, we can talk to, not about. Gossip destroys.

5. If a problem must be addressed, we can avoid blanket statements but identify factual speciﬁcs, offer a positive path forward and preserve everyone’s dignity.

6. We can always extend kindness.

7. When we do wrong one another, we can say to the person harmed, “I was wrong. I am sorry. It won’t happen again. Is there anything I could do now that might make a positive difference?”

-Would you believe they’re Biblically based?

Staying Hungry

2010-05-08T02:08:00.001+10:00

This is the text of the Commencement address by Steve Jobs, CEO of Apple Computer and of Pixar Animation Studios, delivered on June 12, 2005.

I am honored to be with you today at your commencement from one of the finest universities in the world. I never graduated from college. Truth be told, this is the closest I've ever gotten to a college graduation. Today I want to tell you three stories from my life. That's it. No big deal. Just three stories.

The first story is about connecting the dots.

I dropped out of Reed College after the first 6 months, but then stayed around as a drop-in for another 18 months or so before I really quit. So why did I drop out?

It started before I was born. My biological mother was a young, unwed college graduate student, and she decided to put me up for adoption. She felt very strongly that I should be adopted by college graduates, so everything was all set for me to be adopted at birth by a lawyer and his wife. Except that when I popped out they decided at the last minute that they really wanted a girl. So my parents, who were on a waiting list, got a call in the middle of the night asking: "We have an unexpected baby boy; do you want him?" They said: "Of course." My biological mother later found out that my mother had never graduated from college and that my father had never graduated from high school. She refused to sign the final adoption papers. She only relented a few months later when my parents promised that I would someday go to college.

And 17 years later I did go to college. But I naively chose a college that was almost as expensive as Stanford, and all of my working-class parents' savings were being spent on my college tuition. After six months, I couldn't see the value in it. I had no idea what I wanted to do with my life and no idea how college was going to help me figure it out. And here I was spending all of the money my parents had saved their entire life. So I decided to drop out and trust that it would all work out OK. It was pretty scary at the time, but looking back it was one of the best decisions I ever made. The minute I dropped out I could stop taking the required classes that didn't interest me, and begin dropping in on the ones that looked interesting.

It wasn't all romantic. I didn't have a dorm room, so I slept on the floor in friends' rooms, I returned coke bottles for the 5¢ deposits to buy food with, and I would walk the 7 miles across town every Sunday night to get one good meal a week at the Hare Krishna temple. I loved it. And much of what I stumbled into by following my curiosity and intuition turned out to be priceless later on. Let me give you one example:

Reed College at that time offered perhaps the best calligraphy instruction in the country. Throughout the campus every poster, every label on every drawer, was beautifully hand calligraphed. Because I had dropped out and didn't have to take the normal classes, I decided to take a calligraphy class to learn how to do this. I learned about serif and san serif typefaces, about varying the amount of space between different letter combinations, about what makes great typography great. It was beautiful, historical, artistically subtle in a way that science can't capture, and I found it fascinating.

None of this had even a hope of any practical application in my life. But ten years later, when we were designing the first Macintosh computer, it all came back to me. And we designed it all into the Mac. It was the first computer with beautiful typography. If I had never dropped in on that single course in college, the Mac would have never had multiple typefaces or proportionally spaced fonts. And since Windows just copied the Mac, its likely that no personal computer would have them. If I had never dropped out, I would have never dropped in on this calligraphy class, and personal computers might not have the wonderful typography that they do. Of course it was impossible to connect the dots looking forward when I was in college. But it was very, very clear looking backwards ten years later.

Again, you can't connect the dots looking forward; you can only connect them looking backwards. So you have to trust that the dots will somehow connect in your future. You have to trust in something — your gut, destiny, life, karma, whatever. This approach has never let me down, and it has made all the difference in my life.

My second story is about love and loss.

I was lucky — I found what I loved to do early in life. Woz and I started Apple in my parents garage when I was 20. We worked hard, and in 10 years Apple had grown from just the two of us in a garage into a $2 billion company with over 4000 employees. We had just released our finest creation — the Macintosh — a year earlier, and I had just turned 30. And then I got fired. How can you get fired from a company you started? Well, as Apple grew we hired someone who I thought was very talented to run the company with me, and for the first year or so things went well. But then our visions of the future began to diverge and eventually we had a falling out. When we did, our Board of Directors sided with him. So at 30 I was out. And very publicly out. What had been the focus of my entire adult life was gone, and it was devastating.

I really didn't know what to do for a few months. I felt that I had let the previous generation of entrepreneurs down - that I had dropped the baton as it was being passed to me. I met with David Packard and Bob Noyce and tried to apologize for screwing up so badly. I was a very public failure, and I even thought about running away from the valley. But something slowly began to dawn on me — I still loved what I did. The turn of events at Apple had not changed that one bit. I had been rejected, but I was still in love. And so I decided to start over.

I didn't see it then, but it turned out that getting fired from Apple was the best thing that could have ever happened to me. The heaviness of being successful was replaced by the lightness of being a beginner again, less sure about everything. It freed me to enter one of the most creative periods of my life.

During the next five years, I started a company named NeXT, another company named Pixar, and fell in love with an amazing woman who would become my wife. Pixar went on to create the worlds first computer animated feature film, Toy Story, and is now the most successful animation studio in the world. In a remarkable turn of events, Apple bought NeXT, I returned to Apple, and the technology we developed at NeXT is at the heart of Apple's current renaissance. And Laurene and I have a wonderful family together.

I'm pretty sure none of this would have happened if I hadn't been fired from Apple. It was awful tasting medicine, but I guess the patient needed it. Sometimes life hits you in the head with a brick. Don't lose faith. I'm convinced that the only thing that kept me going was that I loved what I did. You've got to find what you love. And that is as true for your work as it is for your lovers. Your work is going to fill a large part of your life, and the only way to be truly satisfied is to do what you believe is great work. And the only way to do great work is to love what you do. If you haven't found it yet, keep looking. Don't settle. As with all matters of the heart, you'll know when you find it. And, like any great relationship, it just gets better and better as the years roll on. So keep looking until you find it. Don't settle.

My third story is about death.

When I was 17, I read a quote that went something like: "If you live each day as if it was your last, someday you'll most certainly be right." It made an impression on me, and since then, for the past 33 years, I have looked in the mirror every morning and asked myself: "If today were the last day of my life, would I want to do what I am about to do today?" And whenever the answer has been "No" for too many days in a row, I know I need to change something.

Remembering that I'll be dead soon is the most important tool I've ever encountered to help me make the big choices in life. Because almost everything — all external expectations, all pride, all fear of embarrassment or failure - these things just fall away in the face of death, leaving only what is truly important. Remembering that you are going to die is the best way I know to avoid the trap of thinking you have something to lose. You are already naked. There is no reason not to follow your heart.

About a year ago I was diagnosed with cancer. I had a scan at 7:30 in the morning, and it clearly showed a tumor on my pancreas. I didn't even know what a pancreas was. The doctors told me this was almost certainly a type of cancer that is incurable, and that I should expect to live no longer than three to six months. My doctor advised me to go home and get my affairs in order, which is doctor's code for prepare to die. It means to try to tell your kids everything you thought you'd have the next 10 years to tell them in just a few months. It means to make sure everything is buttoned up so that it will be as easy as possible for your family. It means to say your goodbyes.

I lived with that diagnosis all day. Later that evening I had a biopsy, where they stuck an endoscope down my throat, through my stomach and into my intestines, put a needle into my pancreas and got a few cells from the tumor. I was sedated, but my wife, who was there, told me that when they viewed the cells under a microscope the doctors started crying because it turned out to be a very rare form of pancreatic cancer that is curable with surgery. I had the surgery and I'm fine now.

This was the closest I've been to facing death, and I hope its the closest I get for a few more decades. Having lived through it, I can now say this to you with a bit more certainty than when death was a useful but purely intellectual concept:

No one wants to die. Even people who want to go to heaven don't want to die to get there. And yet death is the destination we all share. No one has ever escaped it. And that is as it should be, because Death is very likely the single best invention of Life. It is Life's change agent. It clears out the old to make way for the new. Right now the new is you, but someday not too long from now, you will gradually become the old and be cleared away. Sorry to be so dramatic, but it is quite true.

Your time is limited, so don't waste it living someone else's life. Don't be trapped by dogma — which is living with the results of other people's thinking. Don't let the noise of others' opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary.

When I was young, there was an amazing publication called The Whole Earth Catalog, which was one of the bibles of my generation. It was created by a fellow named Stewart Brand not far from here in Menlo Park, and he brought it to life with his poetic touch. This was in the late 1960's, before personal computers and desktop publishing, so it was all made with typewriters, scissors, and polaroid cameras. It was sort of like Google in paperback form, 35 years before Google came along: it was idealistic, and overflowing with neat tools and great notions.

Stewart and his team put out several issues of The Whole Earth Catalog, and then when it had run its course, they put out a final issue. It was the mid-1970s, and I was your age. On the back cover of their final issue was a photograph of an early morning country road, the kind you might find yourself hitchhiking on if you were so adventurous. Beneath it were the words: "Stay Hungry. Stay Foolish." It was their farewell message as they signed off. Stay Hungry. Stay Foolish. And I have always wished that for myself. And now, as you graduate to begin anew, I wish that for you.

Stay Hungry. Stay Foolish.

Thank you all very much.

In Joy and Sorrow

2010-04-01T01:38:00.000+11:00

A King Indeed says:
i think it is alright..... all of us need that my dear...
a little care, a little hug, sufficient attention...
dun feel bad or guilty to have these feelings.
it is NORMAL..

✿Lin-lynn✿ says:
dunno, i just tend to get embarrassed about these things...

A King Indeed says:
haiya...
we are ASIAN...
we train to suppress feelings one...
eheheh..
but dun be misguided..
we need to express la.

✿Lin-lynn✿ says:
Wahaha, I like your point. We are asian = somewhat emotionally retarded :P

A King Indeed says:
exactly.
if u are too rich in emotion, stereotype as weird..

✿Lin-lynn✿ says:
This is the first taste I've had of your honed analyst eyes. LOL

A King Indeed says:
hahahaa~~
we need a way out la seriously
an escape route.

✿Lin-lynn✿ says:
... like?

A King Indeed says:
errrr....
venting ur feelings to a trusted friend.
*wink

✿Lin-lynn✿ says:
Haha, I'm unsure throwing tantrums are much healthier than pent-up emotion, for the other party that is :P

Olden Days

2010-03-31T01:30:00.000+11:00

I find comfort in rereading the letters, all carefully kept and bound in soft brown leather.

Unfortunately, they all seem to be about you.

Time to let go.

Without a Words

2010-03-30T21:14:00.003+11:00

I shouldnt have done that,
I should have pretended not to know
like I didnt see it, like I couldnt see it
I shouldnt have looked at you in the first place

I should have run away,
I should have pretended I wasnt listening
like I didnt hear it, like I couldnt hear it
I shouldnt have heard your love in the first place

Without a word you made me know love
Without a word you gave me love
Because you took just a breath and ran away like this
Without a word love leaves me
Without a word love abandons me
Wondering what to say next, my lips were surprised
Because it came without a word.

Why does it hurt so much?
Why does it hurt continuously?
Except for the fact that I can’t see you anymore
And that you’re not here anymore
Otherwise it’s the same as before

Without a word you made me know love
Without a word you gave me love
Because you took just a breath and ran away like this
Without a word love leaves me
Without a word love abandons me
Wondering what to say next, my lips were surprised

The Last Mother

2010-03-29T02:58:00.000+11:00

Sick.

I feel so sick.
Sick of trying, sick of dying
little by little here
in front of my desk
and the chair that leaves my back aching
in the morning and the evenings
and the minutes in between.

Sickening, isn’t it?
To listen to my moaning
my constant whinging
the never-ending complaints that spill forth
from my lips
a rain of vitriol
a spewing
of hate.

It must make you sick.
That must be it.
The reason you leave me here
coughing and wheezing
struggling to breathe
in a puddle of my own waste.

Leave me
oh leave me then.
Perhaps it is better that way
then you can pretend
that I never existed at all.
Isn’t it an easy escape route?

I’ll leave you then.
Does it make you happy?
An existence without this stone dragging behind you
tied in an aching clasp around your waist.

Perhaps the earth will be kinder to me
in death then it was in life.
Take me back into your folds
Last Mother,
welcome me into your arms
the last embrace.

Tonight.

2010-03-28T00:45:00.001+11:00

It’s dark
at night;
he sings of hope in the darkness
as I sit here, head to knee
knee to wall.

I don’t understand
what he sings of.
The darkness seems a calm cold presence
harmless
but lonely.

Hope.
Crimson skies.
A light to set you free.

What does it all mean?

I sit here, head to knee
knee to wall
and ponder
the hope in his voice
and the words in his songs.

In a darkness that seems so serene.

One Week

2010-03-27T02:58:00.000+11:00

Loves One Week by the Chum.

Frustrated.

What is the matter, dear friend? What is the matter with you? I cannot quite connect the dots. You seem distant.

Are you alright, dear friend? Are you alright, or is it me who is missing something? Something I have not noticed?

Our phone calls were delightful, were they not?
We met, except you did not want a conversation. Are you sad? You looked sad. You looked sad, but you are happy now, yes?
You are happy after leaving.

Hardened hearts.

Last three years had turned us... somewhat cold. Maybe I need to let go. Of our past, of the bond we had built. Least, I believed we had one. We did, did we not? I am uncertain now.

You are different. Changed. Deeply moved.
I should start adjusting.

About Her #3

2010-03-16T15:27:00.001+11:00

Hate? I take it strong and black.

Have You Typed Today?

2010-03-12T15:03:00.000+11:00

I like to type and type and type all day
But at the end there is no time for play
Then I regret having typed my day away
It strikes me that there is more to say
About life than having typed all day.

Papier-mâché

2010-03-11T14:51:00.000+11:00

All of you who laugh and talk, and talk and laugh all day:
What is it that you really feel that you never readily say?
I care not for friendly faces, ersatz as papier-mâché
Just shoot me with your vitriol and be done with it
Instead of hiding your faces behind masks of kneaded clay.

About Her #2

2010-02-11T17:07:00.001+11:00

“You know what, people always say it takes all kinds of people to make the world go round.

That’s bullshit.

Yeah, so it takes allll kinds of people to make the world go round. But companies only want to hire a few types. Nobody wants to hire someone “who is dreamy and prone to flights of fancy” as HR guy put it today. So even if these people help make the world go round, how do they live? In misery and poverty?

Pah.”

About Her #1

2010-02-11T16:55:00.001+11:00

“Mummy, can a psychiatrist fix my head, do you think?

It’s broken.”

Reliving the Past

2010-02-08T17:35:00.000+11:00

There's a place in my heart
And I know that it is love
Love is strong, love is caring
And forgiving.

There are people out there
who would kill for what we share.

But this is all once upon a time.

I dreamt of an idyll; a utopia in which there was me, mine, and you. But I never dared to reach out and touch that dream to you. Now I wonder if, as you slumbered in our bed after your fall, whether my dream actually touched you at all? Could you not know? The selfish extent of my heart, which yearned to encompass you in its embrace and keep you by my side. Something in me bloomed when you reached for me in your need, and I unfolded a secret self I never knew I had. And I welcomed it, all the better to enfold you by my side.

But life came by and separated all in its wake. The drag tide took you back to the north, whilst we, us; we had to return to our lives in the south. That's alright, that's okay, I thought. As our hearts united before when you lived there, so they would again as you moved from place to year to place. After all, didn't technology unite us all, distance no longer a worldly care?

I was wrong.

Maybe it is life that divides. I could feel you slipping through my fingers all the time.

Less time, sudden lengthy disappearances, my worry, your dismissiveness. Your hurried greetings, farewells left unsaid, my recriminations, your distance. My cries for attention emerged as old wives nagging; my desperation in temper honed and shown. You pulled away, a few words of affection a gift too few to calm the drought that parched me. I feel as dried up as the wide brown land I live in. The rains yearned for have not come. The connectors I tried to send you were hints no longer subtle. I even sent you a movie which broached the forbidden: my affection which borders acceptance. Messages unread, unwatched, abandoned.

And then we flew to meet you. Somehow it was shocking. Memories of the last flooded me, anticipation its close companion. I had named it the best journey ever undergone before it even started at all. Was it wrong of me to think our precious burden would render us unchanged?

You were truly the one I needed to see.

So peculiar, so subtle, so hair-raising our meeting. We watched you; the motions seemed appropriate but somehow wrong. We found ourselves floundering to find conversation ground. I started to wonder if it was me again, having grown beyond the ken of those I once called companion. But it was not right. I knew before it would never happen to us, no matter what other threads it cut. But we were special. We were right. We were the ones who could not have a conversation in years and still come together with an understanding so tender and true it bridged time and absence.

But it was all wrong, wrong, wrong. A desert mirage was the one who now spoke to us, laughed a false laugh, kept us at arms length. What is the boundary you set outside yourself? I used to be able to touch the very core. Once there were no filters, no separation, no...

Someone dreamt a dream of me, a dream so dark they would not tell me. Suicide, lost love, a marriage that shouldn't be. Wait a year, they said, watch your health. Don't self-medicate, don't ignore yourself.

I laughed but cried and wondered what it was that required three blessings and a curse.

Now I wonder if they meant you and me, and to 'ware the loss that might drive me to him too soon, too forced. That that union could not stand against the frost - the winter of my heart.

The loss of you could be... the only reason that could self-destruct.

But perhaps my pride and the warning bells my sister rang for me, will help me come to terms with life and the love that cannot be.

Love-lorn, love-worn

2010-01-08T00:21:00.001+11:00

Love is not blind; it just makes you want to close your eyes to the truth.

In the end, it all boils down to whether you want to keep lying to yourself.

My advice?

Don’t. So it may be painful, so it may be hard. That is Life. Deal with it as best you can. Do you really think squeezing your eyes shut to ugly truths and praying for a fairytale ending works? Well, I have news for you. It doesn’t. Accept the truth, ugly as it may be. Accept that you made a fool out of yourself. Allow your pride and anger to vanquish those foolish thoughts. Anger, when it burns long enough, will turn those feeling to ash.

Then you move on.

The Boy who cried Wolf

2009-12-11T17:54:00.000+11:00

So. All of you know this one.

Once upon a time, there was a boy who cried wolf. Because he would sound false alarms all the time, when it came time that a real emergency happened and a wild wolf came, no one came to his aid. So both he and his poor innocent flock of sheep were eaten up. (Okay, so maybe the last part didn’t happen… I don’t quite remember).

The modern day story is of a boy who cried “Woe is me!” one too many times.

As with all false alarms, listeners were slowly lulled into a state of indifference to his cries. Even more so when his house was at the bottom of the hill, and all and sundry had to mountain goat it down the winding trek to his abode. The first step was occasional avoidance. The second, an excuse and invitation to visit the village at the top of the hill. When that was rebuffed time and again, with increasingly apathetic expedients, the villagers reached third stage.

In time, solitary and burdened with weal and woe, the boy…

{Choose your own path. Different choices will give different endings.}

[a] Shrugged, and moved to another village to find new ears for his cries {go to p.191}

[b] Committed suicide in a planned attempt to leave the villagers guilt-ridden and racked with grief at the loss {go to p.212}

[c] Moved up the mountain to the village proper so the villagers could not avoid him {go to p.155}

Training Dogs, Training People

2009-12-11T02:57:00.000+11:00

“Training a dog is all about managing expectations,” says N, dog trainer extraordinaire.

(Seriously, 1.5 hours with him and little Kenji has turned into an angel).

“Your dog has to know what you expect of it must be done. In the same vein, your dog has to understand that whilst it can expect you to tend to its basic necessities as a responsible dog owner, it cannot expect you to come running at its beck and call (or whine and howl). There is only one alpha male leading the pack (and the lead bitch).”

Yes, I laughed at that sentence.

Small Town Evils

2009-12-10T01:28:00.001+11:00

Is it just coincidence, or is there something about small towns that raises the rudest people ever?

I feel bad about making sweeping statements about the general population of my hometown, as I am sure the exceptions to the rule are many. Unfortunately, many too are the people who conform to this statement.

Case-in-point: Mr X goes to Mr and Mrs A’s house-warming party. During the party, Mr X sees a wedding picture of Mr and Mrs A taken 15 years ago. And thus, he feels justified in saying to Mrs A, “You were so pretty then. You’ve gotten fat!”

Horrified? I am. Since when is this considered socially acceptable behaviour?

No, Mr X is not close enough to Mrs A that this is an acceptable comment. And I really think there is no way anyone is close enough to make that comment so bluntly in the first place. Even her best friend would need to be far more subtle about approaching that matter. Mr X is at the house of Mr and Mrs A; partaking in their generosity, imbibing their food and drink, and yet he seems to think that it is perfectly normal to make such a statement about the hostess, to her face. And no, this is no odd occurrence. People here seem to think they have the right to make comments like that all the time.

In the same vein, I cannot recount from memory the number of people that seem to think that just because they went to school with me once upon a lifetime ago, they have the right upon ‘reconnecting’ with me on some social networking site, to offer uninvited feedback about my current appearance. They range from feedback about my tomboy clothes, my feminine clothes, my hair colour, my lack of hair colour, my hairstyle, my weight, my spectacles, and etcetera.

I was not aware that I was on such intimate terms with you that I would take into consideration your opinions on how I should style my hair. And this is particularly humourous as I would not be able to honestly say that I approved of their own personal style (or hygiene, for that matter). If I felt that I wanted to shave my head bald, I would still not expect you to tell me how it did not suit me, unless I asked such a question of you. If I felt that I wanted to get a tomboy cut, I would not expect you to let me know how you felt it was peculiar, unless I asked for your opinion. If I wish to wear a gunny-sack or a $1000 dress, your feedback is still not welcome unless invited.

There are basic principles of socially acceptable behaviour; polite behaviour. I feel sorry that it is I that have to enlighten you that your behaviour does not meet these standards, nor do they reflect the maturity people your age should have achieved a long time ago.

Quote of the Day

2009-11-13T00:41:00.001+11:00

Yunno, the witch in Hansel and Gretel is very misunderstood. I mean, the woman builds her dream house, then these brats come along and eat it!

- Miranda, Sex in the City

The (2nd) Best Job in the World

2009-11-10T14:56:00.003+11:00

No need for Shopaholics Anonymous.

Just apply for the (2nd) Best Job in the World! Sure, it's a bit more work than the other one, but I think many of you women (and some men) out there would die for this opportunity.

Presenting... YOUR JOB!

You’ll get:

- 5€,000 monthly gross salary
- €10,000 shopping budget
- Round-the-world travel in Business Class
- Presigious hotel stays with Accorhotels.com

Your job?

To complete shopping assignments in each city on your journey! Sound tough? You’ll be stopping at cities such as Berlin, London, Milan, Paris, New York, Hong Kong and Tokyo. Once there you’ll have to:

- Find and visit the best shopping districts of each city
- Find products that you simply can’t find anywhere else
- Find products that are cheaper than other countries
- Present the latest trends in a variety of products ranging from fashion to electricals.

As part of this assignment, you’ll be keeping the world up-to-date via a blog. In your role as International Shopping Consultant for LetsBuyIt.com, you’ll be equipped with a digital camera and camcorder to record your every purchase and shopping experience.

You’ll get the blog coupled with Facebook, Twitter, YouTube and Flickr so whatever social network readers are on, you’ll be showing them your trip. And your insights!

Personally, I still prefer the Queensland #1 job.

Waddle Waddle

2009-11-08T20:34:00.002+11:00

The new super additive little jingle (after I Love Eggs kinda died down a while ago).

Waddle waddle waddle. Waddle waddle.

She Looks Like One

2009-11-04T01:26:00.002+11:00

Say "Hi" to the newest member of our family, Kenji.

Why Kenji? Because she just looks like one.

She looks like a smart cookie, eh?

In case you're wondering, she's a Maltese x Mini Schnauzer, which makes for a highly hypoallergenic dog which doesn't molt much. Good for allergy-sufferers.

School: 1959 vs 2009

2009-11-01T18:36:00.002+11:00

I got this in an email forward. Accurate much.

--

Scenario :
Jack goes rabbit shooting before school,
pulls into school parking lot with rifle in gun rack.

1957 - Vice Principal comes over, looks at Jack's rifle, goes to his car and gets his rifle & chats with Jack about guns.

2009 - School goes into lock down, Star Force called, Jack hauled off to jail and never sees his truck or gun again.. Counsellors called in for traumatized students and teachers.

Scenario:
Johnny and Mark get into a fistfight after school.

1957 - Crowd gathers. Mark wins. Johnny and Mark shake hands and end up buddies.

2009 - Police called, arrests Johnny and Mark. Charge them with assault, both expelled even though Johnny started it. Both children go to anger management programs for 3 months... School board hold meeting to impliment bullying prevention programs

Scenario:
Robbie won't be still in class, disrupts other students.

1957 - Robbie sent to office and given 6 of the best by the Principal. Returns to class, sits still and does not disrupt class again.

2009 - Robbie given huge doses of Ritalin. Becomes a zombie. Tested for ADD. Robbie's parents get fortnightly disability payments and School gets extra funding from state because Robbie has a disability.

Scenario :
Billy breaks a window in his neighbor's car and his Dad gives him a whipping with his belt.

1957 - Billy is more careful next time, grows up normal, goes to college, and becomes a successful businessman.

2009 - Billy's dad is arrested for child abuse. Billy removed to foster care and joins a gang. State psychologist tells Billy's sister that she remembers being abused herself and their dad goes to prison.

Scenario :
Mark gets a headache and takes some aspirin to school.

1957 - Mark gets glass of water from Principal to take aspirin with.

2009 - Police called, Mark expelled from school for drug violations. Car searched for drugs and weapons.

Scenario :
Pedro fails high school English.

1957 - Pedro goes to summer school, passes English and goes to college.

2009 - Pedro's cause is taken up by state. Newspaper articles appear nationally explaining that teaching English as a requirement for graduation is racist. AFRE files class action lawsuit against state school system and Pedro's English teacher. English banned from core curriculum. Pedro given diploma anyway but ends up mowing lawns for a living because he cannot speak English.

Scenario :
Johnny takes apart leftover firecrackers from Guy Fawkes, puts them in a model airplane paint bottle, blows up a bull-ant nest.

1957 - Ants die.

2009 - State Police, Star Force, Federal Police & Anti-terrorism Squad called. Johnny charged with domestic terrorism, Feds investigate parents, siblings removed from home, computers confiscated. Johnny's Dad goes on a terror watch list and is never allowed to fly again.

Scenario :
Johnny falls while running during recess and scrapes his knee. He is found crying by his teacher, Mary. Mary hugs him to comfort him.

1957 - In a short time, Johnny feels better and goes on playing.

2009 - Mary is accused of being a sexual predator and loses her job. She faces 3 years in Prison. Johnny undergoes 5 years of therapy.

--

An addition.

Scenario :
Parents think their little kiddies are so cute bobbing rubber duckies in the bath. Take a photo for memories.

1957 - Dad reminiscing about his darling daughters shows photos to their boyfriends 20 years down the road. Kids are embarrassed but everyone sees the funny side and laughs.

2009 - Parents are arrested for child abuse and child pornography.

What has our world come to?

2019

2009-10-17T21:05:00.004+11:00

The real-time translation in the school room is pretty awesome. I love.

And! I would never get lost again. Excellent.

Those TV Chefs

2009-10-16T21:19:00.001+11:00

I have never particularly liked many of the chefs-turned-tv-celebrities that have taken over the Food Channel. I find many of them are usually egoistical and have restaurants that are highly overrated. This usually translates to brusque customer service and summary dismissal of reviews that are less than worshipping.

So recently there was that George Calombaris’ article attacking food bloggers. And now there is this, Neil Perry’s (Rockpool) email responses to a disappointed customer. Which basically has only reinforced my opinion that most tv chefs are overrated.

When I ate at Rockpool, I found it rather mediocre, and frankly extremely overpriced for the quality of food we were getting. I however, had no problems with the waitstaff, who were very professional and friendly. From this email, it sounds like they were having a bad night, which can be excused. What I find extremely offensive, is Perry’s response. Sure, I get irritated as well with people who think fish have no bones, amongst other things, but the point is managing customer expectations, is it not? They should have just told her it couldn’t be done, with apologies, and more apologies for the rough night they had. Period.

I mean, if all the POS systems managed by a company all went down for an entire day, I am sure the company would be apologising and explaining the matter to all its clients. Not being sarcastic and telling them about the bad day they just had and how they should be more understanding. Customers pay for the experience. Even if you have a bad day, which happens (we’re all human), the point is they paid for your bad day and the least you could do is tender a sincere apology.

When?

2009-10-12T14:07:00.001+11:00

I would so shop more if this was available now. I guess it's better that it isn't then, huh.

Lindt Disasters

2009-10-08T14:49:00.003+11:00

I was reading Eating with Jack and came across his post on Lindt Cafe, Melbourne. Just reminded me of my rather horrendous experience there some time ago.

Here's a repost of the comment I left on his site, just because it's like a... public service announcement(!!!) to people to stop wasting their money on such substandard stuff when there are tons of better desserts and even chocolate cafes in Melbourne. Melbourne is full of them. So why Lindt? Or that cupcake chain, or that infamous doughnut chain I care so little for I don't even remember their names that all came from Sydney? Melbourne is a city full of hidden treasures. There are far better versions of chocolate, cupcakes, AND doughnuts all over Melbourne minus the branding and PR of said chains. And maybe in true Melbourne style, hidden along little alleyways.

Bringing Sydney friends around Melbourne has been hilarious actually. They keep asking me why I keep bringing them into "dodgy little alleyways". "Are you trying to sell me?" But Melbourne's best kept food secrets are all in its little lanes, not big and supermarket bright.

Anyway, on to the Lindt ~~bashing~~ review:

Since all my friends were raving about it and one was working at a competitor and wanted to suss out the competition, the both of us went down to Lindt, about a month after opening.

First off, the service was abhorrent. We stood at the front of the queue waiting to be seating nigh onto 10 minutes and considered walking out when unable to catch the attention of any waiter. Just as we were about to walk out, a lady behind us tapped me on the shoulder and asked if we had been attended to at all, and when we said no, was shocked. She then marched over to the nearest waiter and sternly told him off, saying even if they were full, we should at least have been greeted. LOL. Go her!

Finally seated, I opted for the cake of the day with coffee, which I passed to my friend. And some strawberry mousse-thingy I can't remember the name of. That was alright. The opera cake of the day tasted and stale and dry as if it had been made two days ago and left uncovered. Which may be why it was the cake of the day... The latte was bubbly in a disturbing manner reminiscent of a witch's cauldron and so bad my friend (behind a napkin) spat out his mouthful.

Lindt is NOT GOOD. WHY it continues to attract such a huge crowd is beyond me. Well, perhaps the same reason so many bad restaurants still survive in the city. (Have you watched the Chopping Block on the Food Channel? It makes you realise you definitely do not just randomly pick a place to eat and walk in unless you want to eat rancid week-old pasta among other things...) Pure volume of customers.

Or maybe, um, people from other countries with bad chocolate? There is a very large Asian population in almost every chocolate cafe you walk into. Well, I know chocolate in Malaysia is made with palm oil, as our milk supplies are very limited and are not very nice. Which made me very happy to eat even supermarket blocks of chocolate when I first arrived in Australia.

I suppose I have since developed increasingly expensive taste as my disposable income increases from my student days. I also eat a lot less, which means I want smaller portions of GOOD food and not huge portions of bad or average food. I no longer get chocolate cravings where I could eat $50 worth of chocolate in a sitting, and only eat finer dark chocolate nowadays in small portions. But regardless, there are definitely many other better options for chocolate in Melbourne, and Lindt has been the biggest ripoff I have been to, ever.

To the downtrodden

2009-10-08T01:15:00.001+11:00

Reproduced from Simply Scribbled, because I love it and want to keep it.

--

We should carry on, carry on, carry on, while the sky waits on the sun and the minstrel stealing his light. We should carry on, carry on, carry on, while rivers sing aloud our follies and aimless escapades. We should drift away, drift away, drift away, as we read about withering roses and gilded butterflies. We should stray, stray, stray, from the city and its warm sugary pop of dark, twirling hot chocolate. And we should stay, for a while, and listen, and maybe hear howls of winters past, those lost but not forgotten. And we shall fall away, into a deep deep sleep to drown all worries in a deep blue dream. And thereafter we shall rise again, for the rest is still unwritten, waiting, undone.

So Many Things to Do

2009-10-08T00:44:00.002+11:00

So little time. Or at least, so little time to do the things I would LIKE to do, instead of the things I HAVE to do.

Wouldn't it be nice not to have to work. LOL. Then I would have more time for my languages, my hobbies, tv... get through my list of goals before I'm old and gray...

WOULD-LIKE-TO-DO LIST
(Wonder whether I'll get through them all before I'm 30?)

1. Learn Japanese (in progress)
2. Learn to read and write in Mandarin (in progress)
3. Finish building my website... this better be done before I'm 30. LOL.
4. Learn Korean
5. Learn to play the gǔzhēng (or is it gǔqín? The one in all the wuxia serials? Someone tell me which and where to learn. LOL.)
6. Refamiliarise my fingers to the piano again after a long abstinence
7. Read more good books, recommendations welcome
8. Learn to surf
9. Learn to scuba dive
10. Learn another martial art, tai chi or wushu? Hmmm...
11. Learn French
12. Learn Italian
13. Learn Spanish
14. Learn Latin
15. Buy my beloved Mazda CX7 without a loan
16. Learn to play the flute
17. Learn Mandarin poetry! W00t.
18. Learn Cantonese
19. Learn Thai
20. Manage to keep a hold of all the damn languages I learnt...

What would you like to do if only you had more time?

Stock Market Talk

2009-09-27T20:52:00.003+10:00

HA HA HA HA HA!!!

Signs

2009-09-27T20:42:00.002+10:00

What did you see?

A story of hope? Or one of a desperate loneliness and the need to connect?

21st century Urban Living

2009-09-14T15:06:00.001+10:00

i yike... :P

85 goes down

2009-09-01T00:04:00.000+10:00

"Just like every other 85'er, I'm now in w-t-f-f-m-l mode."

- Vinsant

Right on.

Evolution of IT

2009-08-30T14:51:00.001+10:00

An interesting little presentation.

Describing Him #3

2009-08-29T04:19:00.001+10:00

A curve his hips mirrored.

Describing Him #2

2009-08-28T04:17:00.000+10:00

He smiled at me: a sad, sweet curve.

Describing Him #1

2009-08-27T04:13:00.001+10:00

A quiet, gentle melancholy covered him like a blanket; not strong enough even, to be black. Instead, it settled over his shoulders like a tasteful shade of gray.

Careless Absence

2009-08-26T03:52:00.002+10:00

Do you know?
You reduce me to tears.

People reading this might think
(will think)
of a lover lost
or dead.

Sometimes it seems unclear to me
if I view you
as a lover, friend...
or in my loneliness
do I clutch you close

Like a crutch.

But you slip yourself out
from under my arm
and walk away, so simply.
Uncaring
that you leave me here
crippled;
broken on the floor.

Ignorance: studied or artless?

Addiction

2009-08-26T02:30:00.001+10:00

Late at night I find myself waiting for you, the tips of my fingers hovering above the keypad of my phone.

I need to be weaned away from you, but the temptation to regress is great...

Stop.

H1N1 Prevention

2009-08-23T23:45:00.000+10:00

Why is H1N1 such an epidemic when all you need to do is... wash your hands! (and your body too...)

Kantoi!!!

2009-08-23T19:08:00.001+10:00

This is so cute! :D

Dolphins play with...?

2009-08-22T23:35:00.000+10:00

Dolphin making bubble rings! How cool is that?

Do you MMORPG?

2009-08-21T01:23:00.001+10:00

Yes? Then...

Do you wanna date my avatar? She's a STAR! *guffaws*

Mid-Life Crisis?

2009-08-20T01:22:00.002+10:00

Hitting quarter-life crisis.

Wait, make that one-third-life crisis. I don't want to live THAT long.

--

STM said today, "Hey, don't you realise we're planning in years now. A couple of years back, planning what we'd do tomorrow or next week was the norm. Now we're talking goals and holidays in years."

>.<||

I hate to admit it but what all the oldies told you about life going faster as you get older is all true. I can't believe it's almost the end of 2009 already.

H1N1 Fever

2009-08-20T00:24:00.001+10:00

"200 people get swine flu & the world wants to wear masks. 20,000,000 people have AIDS, and still no one wants to wear a condom."

Quote from here.

The Virgin Sea

2009-08-19T01:00:00.004+10:00

I am a water baby.

The toss and turn of the waves at sea buoying me up... I dream of it. I dream of rolling between waves, thrown about like a piece of driftwood. I dream of the many jewelled colours of the seabed, a myriad shades of turqoise and a hint of coral red.

I remember as a toddler, padding right into a swimming pool and sinking like a stone. Somehow it didn't inflict fear into my heart. I remember it dispassionately.

And then there are days of vacation at seaside resorts, where I am not allowed out to sea, but spend whole days paddling about in the chlorinated water of the hotel swimming pool. Morning till the even, with only short breaks to eat. Swimming and floating and paddling, and doing water gymnastics. Cartwheels and somersaults and walking on hands. Swimming sideways like a crab. Flipping from back to tummy and back again. Buoyed.

It is always a disappointment to get back on land and feel weighed down again.

And then I discovered the sea.

At first I was afraid. With poor eyesight and no glasses, its depths could not be fathomed. There was weed, slime, and worry for sea urchins and jellyfish, or even water snakes. And then there was me, half-blind, floundering into the sea and falling over a rock and cutting my knee. The salt-water made sure it bled unstoppably for the rest of the day. Fish bit me, the water was murky and unpenetrable, and there were uncountable sea urchins, their long spines waving fearsomely at me. I did not dare to set my feet down anywhere. But the snorkelling goggles blocked my nose and made me flounder to find purchase.

But in the clean clear unspoiled waters of beaches far, far away from the city, I let the waves dash me against the sand. Learnt to roll inside the current, learnt to swim fearlessly out to sea and pull against the dragtide back towards land. Learnt to throw away the snorkelling goggles and use the normal ones instead; controlling my breath I could turn upside down and still keep water from my nose. I chased fish, dug for pippies, tried to catch abalones on the seabed.

The sea is a fearsome, unknown, wonderful, enticing fairyland.

The sand smoothens the skin, and the salt water cures my eczema, tightens my pores. I cannot understand why others detest it.

The only vacations worth taking are those on crystal beaches in waters with a hint of ice.

Affection Lost

2009-08-18T02:12:00.008+10:00

     I could write a thousand things, but in the end
        all I want to write about is you.
     If I could speak above a whisper of all things,
        I would sing out that the love I have for you is true.
     And if the sky above showed its frown
        in thunder, storm clouds and rain,
     I would tell the world I did not care
        if, in loving you, I became the World's Bane.

I may be a cynic. Stop. Rewind. I mean, I AM a cynic.

Glass half empty, not glass half full.

But I never did believe in this convenient sort of love. The type that claims love at first sight. Or meeting someone at a club one night and becoming a couple the next. Yes, I know I know, we all know of someone whom this sort of love has worked for. "Look at them," you tell me. They did, and they've been together for three years now.

To which I say: "Poppycock".

I don't believe you can know someone well enough to love them just like that. I was always a proponent of being friends first and growing to love each other. And even then it takes years and years to settle down into a relationship mature enough to withstand storms, temptation, and hardship. Forgiveness is as important as trust. I believe people will always make mistakes.

If you can't accept that, you will not last. Plain and simple.

If you have been living illusions for the past three years carried on from your love at first sight meeting, I have my doubts.

I think there is an underlying trait you will discover one day which drives you apart. At least it will be a wedge that drains the water from the pond slowly. And if not mended, *poof*. The pond is dry.

Maybe that is why all these stupid convenient love stories like Twilight irritate me to no end. I have no romantic core, or at least, one very different to your own. I mean, I would find it romantic if it's tragic and one of them dies!

McD's

2009-08-17T13:56:00.001+10:00

Wow... never knew Ronald McDonald looked so hot. LOL.

And the world keeps turning

2009-08-16T20:13:00.004+10:00

No matter how close you are, can you feel yourselves drifting further apart when seperated by distance? Relationships you thought would be unaffected by time and geography, sadly seem to be turning the same way as all the others who have already drifted away.

Developing in different directions, making different life choices.

One day you wake up and discover, both of you are no longer the same people you were.

What you think is important, what advice you give in hopes that she will not be falling down the same wrong path that you took... all of it falls on deaf ears. Maybe you should just stop wasting your breath and risking indignation to worry about your own life direction. You can't help those who don't want to change. You should concentrate on helping yourself survive this War that is... Life.

Love love love love, crazy love

2009-08-16T19:57:00.003+10:00

I wonder why training, although not particularly boring, can't excite me like a simple Body Combat class can. You probably will have to drag my lazy ass to any other class except for Body Combat, after which I will come home and hibernate.

But after an hour of Combat, I'll be leaping around the house doing stunts. LOL. Crazy Love.

まるです。

2009-08-15T12:25:00.000+10:00

Exercise – Yes / No?

2009-08-13T23:01:00.001+10:00

Why Exercise Won't Make You Thin

By John Cloud Sunday, Aug. 09, 2009 – Article reproduced from here.

Whether because exercise makes us hungry or because we want to reward ourselves, many people eat more — and eat more junk food, like doughnuts — after going to the gym.

As I write this, tomorrow is Tuesday, which is a cardio day. I'll spend five minutes warming up on the VersaClimber, a towering machine that requires you to move your arms and legs simultaneously. Then I'll do 30 minutes on a stair mill. On Wednesday a personal trainer will work me like a farm animal for an hour, sometimes to the point that I am dizzy — an abuse for which I pay as much as I spend on groceries in a week. Thursday is "body wedge" class, which involves another exercise contraption, this one a large foam wedge from which I will push myself up in various hateful ways for an hour. Friday will bring a 5.5-mile run, the extra half-mile my grueling expiation of any gastronomical indulgences during the week.

I have exercised like this — obsessively, a bit grimly — for years, but recently I began to wonder: Why am I doing this? Except for a two-year period at the end of an unhappy relationship — a period when I self-medicated with lots of Italian desserts — I have never been overweight. One of the most widely accepted, commonly repeated assumptions in our culture is that if you exercise, you will lose weight. But I exercise all the time, and since I ended that relationship and cut most of those desserts, my weight has returned to the same 163 lb. it has been most of my adult life. I still have gut fat that hangs over my belt when I sit. Why isn't all the exercise wiping it out?

It's a question many of us could ask. More than 45 million Americans now belong to a health club, up from 23 million in 1993. We spend some $19 billion a year on gym memberships. Of course, some people join and never go. Still, as one major study — the Minnesota Heart Survey — found, more of us at least say we exercise regularly. The survey ran from 1980, when only 47% of respondents said they engaged in regular exercise, to 2000, when the figure had grown to 57%.

And yet obesity figures have risen dramatically in the same period: a third of Americans are obese, and another third count as overweight by the Federal Government's definition. Yes, it's entirely possible that those of us who regularly go to the gym would weigh even more if we exercised less. But like many other people, I get hungry after I exercise, so I often eat more on the days I work out than on the days I don't. Could exercise actually be keeping me from losing weight?

The conventional wisdom that exercise is essential for shedding pounds is actually fairly new. As recently as the 1960s, doctors routinely advised against rigorous exercise, particularly for older adults who could injure themselves. Today doctors encourage even their oldest patients to exercise, which is sound advice for many reasons: People who regularly exercise are at significantly lower risk for all manner of diseases — those of the heart in particular. They less often develop cancer, diabetes and many other illnesses. But the past few years of obesity research show that the role of exercise in weight loss has been wildly overstated.

"In general, for weight loss, exercise is pretty useless," says Eric Ravussin, chair in diabetes and metabolism at Louisiana State University and a prominent exercise researcher. Many recent studies have found that exercise isn't as important in helping people lose weight as you hear so regularly in gym advertisements or on shows like The Biggest Loser — or, for that matter, from magazines like this one.

The basic problem is that while it's true that exercise burns calories and that you must burn calories to lose weight, exercise has another effect: it can stimulate hunger. That causes us to eat more, which in turn can negate the weight-loss benefits we just accrued. Exercise, in other words, isn't necessarily helping us lose weight. It may even be making it harder.

The Compensation Problem
Earlier this year, the peer-reviewed journal PLoS ONE — PLoS is the nonprofit Public Library of Science — published a remarkable study supervised by a colleague of Ravussin's, Dr. Timothy Church, who holds the rather grand title of chair in health wisdom at LSU. Church's team randomly assigned into four groups 464 overweight women who didn't regularly exercise. Women in three of the groups were asked to work out with a personal trainer for 72 min., 136 min., and 194 min. per week, respectively, for six months. Women in the fourth cluster, the control group, were told to maintain their usual physical-activity routines. All the women were asked not to change their dietary habits and to fill out monthly medical-symptom questionnaires.

The findings were surprising. On average, the women in all the groups, even the control group, lost weight, but the women who exercised — sweating it out with a trainer several days a week for six months — did not lose significantly more weight than the control subjects did. (The control-group women may have lost weight because they were filling out those regular health forms, which may have prompted them to consume fewer doughnuts.) Some of the women in each of the four groups actually gained weight, some more than 10 lb. each.

What's going on here? Church calls it compensation, but you and I might know it as the lip-licking anticipation of perfectly salted, golden-brown French fries after a hard trip to the gym. Whether because exercise made them hungry or because they wanted to reward themselves (or both), most of the women who exercised ate more than they did before they started the experiment. Or they compensated in another way, by moving around a lot less than usual after they got home.

The findings are important because the government and various medical organizations routinely prescribe more and more exercise for those who want to lose weight. In 2007 the American College of Sports Medicine and the American Heart Association issued new guidelines stating that "to lose weight ... 60 to 90 minutes of physical activity may be necessary." That's 60 to 90 minutes on most days of the week, a level that not only is unrealistic for those of us trying to keep or find a job but also could easily produce, on the basis of Church's data, ravenous compensatory eating.

It's true that after six months of working out, most of the exercisers in Church's study were able to trim their waistlines slightly — by about an inch. Even so, they lost no more overall body fat than the control group did. Why not?

Church, who is 41 and has lived in Baton Rouge for nearly three years, has a theory. "I see this anecdotally amongst, like, my wife's friends," he says. "They're like, 'Ah, I'm running an hour a day, and I'm not losing any weight.'" He asks them, "What are you doing after you run?" It turns out one group of friends was stopping at Starbucks for muffins afterward. Says Church: "I don't think most people would appreciate that, wow, you only burned 200 or 300 calories, which you're going to neutralize with just half that muffin."

You might think half a muffin over an entire day wouldn't matter much, particularly if you exercise regularly. After all, doesn't exercise turn fat to muscle, and doesn't muscle process excess calories more efficiently than fat does?

Yes, although the muscle-fat relationship is often misunderstood. According to calculations published in the journal Obesity Research by a Columbia University team in 2001, a pound of muscle burns approximately six calories a day in a resting body, compared with the two calories that a pound of fat burns. Which means that after you work out hard enough to convert, say, 10 lb. of fat to muscle — a major achievement — you would be able to eat only an extra 40 calories per day, about the amount in a teaspoon of butter, before beginning to gain weight. Good luck with that.

Fundamentally, humans are not a species that evolved to dispose of many extra calories beyond what we need to live. Rats, among other species, have a far greater capacity to cope with excess calories than we do because they have more of a dark-colored tissue called brown fat. Brown fat helps produce a protein that switches off little cellular units called mitochondria, which are the cells' power plants: they help turn nutrients into energy. When they're switched off, animals don't get an energy boost. Instead, the animals literally get warmer. And as their temperature rises, calories burn effortlessly.

Because rodents have a lot of brown fat, it's very difficult to make them obese, even when you force-feed them in labs. But humans — we're pathetic. We have so little brown fat that researchers didn't even report its existence in adults until earlier this year. That's one reason humans can gain weight with just an extra half-muffin a day: we almost instantly store most of the calories we don't need in our regular ("white") fat cells.

All this helps explain why our herculean exercise over the past 30 years — all the personal trainers, StairMasters and VersaClimbers; all the Pilates classes and yoga retreats and fat camps — hasn't made us thinner. After we exercise, we often crave sugary calories like those in muffins or in "sports" drinks like Gatorade. A standard 20-oz. bottle of Gatorade contains 130 calories. If you're hot and thirsty after a 20-minute run in summer heat, it's easy to guzzle that bottle in 20 seconds, in which case the caloric expenditure and the caloric intake are probably a wash. From a weight-loss perspective, you would have been better off sitting on the sofa knitting.

Self-Control Is like a Muscle
Many people assume that weight is mostly a matter of willpower — that we can learn both to exercise and to avoid muffins and Gatorade. A few of us can, but evolution did not build us to do this for very long. In 2000 the journal Psychological Bulletin published a paper by psychologists Mark Muraven and Roy Baumeister in which they observed that self-control is like a muscle: it weakens each day after you use it. If you force yourself to jog for an hour, your self-regulatory capacity is proportionately enfeebled. Rather than lunching on a salad, you'll be more likely to opt for pizza.

Some of us can will ourselves to overcome our basic psychology, but most of us won't be very successful. "The most powerful determinant of your dietary intake is your energy expenditure," says Steven Gortmaker, who heads Harvard's Prevention Research Center on Nutrition and Physical Activity. "If you're more physically active, you're going to get hungry and eat more." Gortmaker, who has studied childhood obesity, is even suspicious of the playgrounds at fast-food restaurants. "Why would they build those?" he asks. "I know it sounds kind of like conspiracy theory, but you have to think, if a kid plays five minutes and burns 50 calories, he might then go inside and consume 500 calories or even 1,000."

Last year the International Journal of Obesity published a paper by Gortmaker and Kendrin Sonneville of Children's Hospital Boston noting that "there is a widespread assumption that increasing activity will result in a net reduction in any energy gap" — energy gap being the term scientists use for the difference between the number of calories you use and the number you consume. But Gortmaker and Sonneville found in their 18-month study of 538 students that when kids start to exercise, they end up eating more — not just a little more, but an average of 100 calories more than they had just burned.

If evolution didn't program us to lose weight through exercise, what did it program us to do? Doesn't exercise do anything?

Sure. It does plenty. In addition to enhancing heart health and helping prevent disease, exercise improves your mental health and cognitive ability. A study published in June in the journal Neurology found that older people who exercise at least once a week are 30% more likely to maintain cognitive function than those who exercise less. Another study, released by the University of Alberta a few weeks ago, found that people with chronic back pain who exercise four days a week have 36% less disability than those who exercise only two or three days a week.

But there's some confusion about whether it is exercise — sweaty, exhausting, hunger-producing bursts of activity done exclusively to benefit our health — that leads to all these benefits or something far simpler: regularly moving during our waking hours. We all need to move more — the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention says our leisure-time physical activity (including things like golfing, gardening and walking) has decreased since the late 1980s, right around the time the gym boom really exploded. But do we need to stress our bodies at the gym?

Look at kids. In May a team of researchers at Peninsula Medical School in the U.K. traveled to Amsterdam to present some surprising findings to the European Congress on Obesity. The Peninsula scientists had studied 206 kids, ages 7 to 11, at three schools in and around Plymouth, a city of 250,000 on the southern coast of England. Kids at the first school, an expensive private academy, got an average of 9.2 hours per week of scheduled, usually rigorous physical education. Kids at the two other schools — one in a village near Plymouth and the other an urban school — got just 2.4 hours and 1.7 hours of PE per week, respectively.

To understand just how much physical activity the kids were getting, the Peninsula team had them wear ActiGraphs, light but sophisticated devices that measure not only the amount of physical movement the body engages in but also its intensity. During four one-week periods over consecutive school terms, the kids wore the ActiGraphs nearly every waking moment.

And no matter how much PE they got during school hours, when you look at the whole day, the kids from the three schools moved the same amount, at about the same intensity. The kids at the fancy private school underwent significantly more physical activity before 3 p.m., but overall they didn't move more. "Once they get home, if they are very active in school, they are probably staying still a bit more because they've already expended so much energy," says Alissa Frémeaux, a biostatistician who helped conduct the study. "The others are more likely to grab a bike and run around after school."

Another British study, this one from the University of Exeter, found that kids who regularly move in short bursts — running to catch a ball, racing up and down stairs to collect toys — are just as healthy as kids who participate in sports that require vigorous, sustained exercise.

Could pushing people to exercise more actually be contributing to our obesity problem? In some respects, yes. Because exercise depletes not just the body's muscles but the brain's self-control "muscle" as well, many of us will feel greater entitlement to eat a bag of chips during that lazy time after we get back from the gym. This explains why exercise could make you heavier — or at least why even my wretched four hours of exercise a week aren't eliminating all my fat. It's likely that I am more sedentary during my nonexercise hours than I would be if I didn't exercise with such Puritan fury. If I exercised less, I might feel like walking more instead of hopping into a cab; I might have enough energy to shop for food, cook and then clean instead of ordering a satisfyingly greasy burrito.

Closing the Energy Gap
The problem ultimately is about not exercise itself but the way we've come to define it. Many obesity researchers now believe that very frequent, low-level physical activity — the kind humans did for tens of thousands of years before the leaf blower was invented — may actually work better for us than the occasional bouts of exercise you get as a gym rat. "You cannot sit still all day long and then have 30 minutes of exercise without producing stress on the muscles," says Hans-Rudolf Berthoud, a neurobiologist at LSU's Pennington Biomedical Research Center who has studied nutrition for 20 years. "The muscles will ache, and you may not want to move after. But to burn calories, the muscle movements don't have to be extreme. It would be better to distribute the movements throughout the day."

For his part, Berthoud rises at 5 a.m. to walk around his neighborhood several times. He also takes the stairs when possible. "Even if people can get out of their offices, out from in front of their computers, they go someplace like the mall and then take the elevator," he says. "This is the real problem, not that we don't go to the gym enough."

I was skeptical when Berthoud said this. Don't you need to raise your heart rate and sweat in order to strengthen your cardiovascular system? Don't you need to push your muscles to the max in order to build them?

Actually, it's not clear that vigorous exercise like running carries more benefits than a moderately strenuous activity like walking while carrying groceries. You regularly hear about the benefits of exercise in news stories, but if you read the academic papers on which these stories are based, you frequently see that the research subjects who were studied didn't clobber themselves on the elliptical machine. A routine example: in June the Association for Psychological Science issued a news release saying that "physical exercise ... may indeed preserve or enhance various aspects of cognitive functioning." But in fact, those who had better cognitive function merely walked more and climbed more stairs. They didn't even walk faster; walking speed wasn't correlated with cognitive ability.

There's also growing evidence that when it comes to preventing certain diseases, losing weight may be more important than improving cardiovascular health. In June, Northwestern University researchers released the results of the longest observational study ever to investigate the relationship between aerobic fitness and the development of diabetes. The results? Being aerobically fit was far less important than having a normal body mass index in preventing the disease. And as we have seen, exercise often does little to help heavy people reach a normal weight.

So why does the belief persist that exercise leads to weight loss, given all the scientific evidence to the contrary? Interestingly, until the 1970s, few obesity researchers promoted exercise as critical for weight reduction. As recently as 1992, when a stout Bill Clinton became famous for his jogging and McDonald's habits, the American Journal of Clinical Nutrition published an article that began, "Recently, the interest in the potential of adding exercise to the treatment of obesity has increased." The article went on to note that incorporating exercise training into obesity treatment had led to "inconsistent" results. "The increased energy expenditure obtained by training may be compensated by a decrease in non-training physical activities," the authors wrote.

Then how did the exercise-to-lose-weight mantra become so ingrained? Public-health officials have been reluctant to downplay exercise because those who are more physically active are, overall, healthier. Plus, it's hard even for experts to renounce the notion that exercise is essential for weight loss. For years, psychologist Kelly Brownell ran a lab at Yale that treated obese patients with the standard, drilled-into-your-head combination of more exercise and less food. "What we found was that the treatment of obesity was very frustrating," he says. Only about 5% of participants could keep the weight off, and although those 5% were more likely to exercise than those who got fat again, Brownell says if he were running the program today, "I would probably reorient toward food and away from exercise." In 2005, Brownell co-founded Yale's Rudd Center for Food Policy and Obesity, which focuses on food marketing and public policy — not on encouraging more exercise.

Some research has found that the obese already "exercise" more than most of the rest of us. In May, Dr. Arn Eliasson of the Walter Reed Army Medical Center reported the results of a small study that found that overweight people actually expend significantly more calories every day than people of normal weight — 3,064 vs. 2,080. He isn't the first researcher to reach this conclusion. As science writer Gary Taubes noted in his 2007 book Good Calories, Bad Calories: Fats, Carbs, and the Controversial Science of Diet and Health, "The obese tend to expend more energy than lean people of comparable height, sex, and bone structure, which means their metabolism is typically burning off more calories rather than less."

In short, it's what you eat, not how hard you try to work it off, that matters more in losing weight. You should exercise to improve your health, but be warned: fiery spurts of vigorous exercise could lead to weight gain. I love how exercise makes me feel, but tomorrow I might skip the VersaClimber — and skip the blueberry bar that is my usual postexercise reward.

Laziness Gene

2009-08-11T22:56:00.002+10:00

Is There a Laziness Gene?

By Deirdre van Dyk Wednesday, Jul. 30, 2008 – Article reproduced from here.

Have you ever wondered why you can't get off the couch and exercise — despite paying for an expensive gym membership, despite your New Year's resolutions, even despite the doctor's scolding at your last checkup? Turns out that your inertia may be coded right into your genes.

Based on some intriguing preliminary studies in animals, J. Timothy Lightfoot, a kinesiologist, and his team at the University of North Carolina, Charlotte, suggest that genetics may indeed predispose some of us to sloth. Using mice specially bred and selected according to their activity levels, Lightfoot identified 20 different genomic locations that work in tandem to influence their activity levels — specifically, how far the animals will run. Lightfoot's team is the first to identify these genetic areas and the first to figure out that they function in concert. The researchers say the areas they found on the mouse genome may have analogs in humans, and the UNC team is now gearing up to conduct a similar study in men and women. "We have put forward a fairly complete genomic map of the areas that are associated with regulation of physical activity," says Lightfoot, whose study is published in the current issue of the Journal of Heredity.

Lightfoot, who originally wanted to coach college basketball and is himself an avid athlete, began studying activity levels as a way to try to figure out why, given all we know about the overwhelming health benefits of physical activity, so many people still choose not to exercise. A lecture at Johns Hopkins University about genetics and lung disease served as Lightfoot's eureka moment, and he became interested in studying genes as our prime mover. For the new study, Lightfoot and his team bred two strains of mice — active and inactive. Researchers then crossbred two generations of the active and inactive mice, ending up with a study group of 310 genetically mixed offspring. At about 9 weeks old, each mouse was housed in an individual cage and given an exercise wheel. Researchers measured how far, how long and how fast the animals ran every day for three weeks, at the end of which the mice were genotyped.

Exercise-prone mice put in a good 5 to 8 miles per day (the equivalent of an average man running 40 to 50 miles a day) vs. 0.3 miles per day for inactive mice. While the exercise wheels of the activity-prone mice would turn all night, some of the sedentary mice devised ingenious ways to avoid activity. One stuffed wood shavings around the wheel and turned it into a bed; one used it as an, ahem, toilet; and one climbed on top of her wheel only to get a better look at the overhead sensors tracking her movements.

Although the animals' activity levels could not be entirely attributed to genes, researchers calculated that heredity accounted for about 50% of the differences in activity. They also found that activity-promoting genes were dominant traits in 75% of the exercise-loving mice. (Researchers don't know yet how often the activity-inclined genotype would naturally occur; Lightfoot says he found a fairly continuous range of activity levels, from extremely active to very low-active, in about 30 mice strains he tested.) "When we used to talk about activity, it was whether or not people decided to be active," says Lightfoot. "Now it's clear that there's an inherent drive as to whether one is active or not active."

Exactly how that drive plays out in the body is still a mystery. There are two theories, Lightfoot says: Genes may affect either the way muscles work — perhaps causing them to use energy more efficiently and preventing fatigue — or some higher-order biochemical circuit in the brain, such as levels of the neurotransmitters dopamine or serotonin. Researchers have examined the muscle tissue of the mice in the study, however, and early data, which has not yet been published, suggests that there's no difference in their function. So the researchers' best guess is that the drive to exercise is at least partly influenced by brain chemicals — a reasonable hypothesis, given that dopamine or serotonin plays a significant role in several human drives and behaviors, including hunger, addiction, mood and movement disorders like Parkinson's disease.

Chemistry is not destiny, of course. Lightfoot hopes to use his research to help determine which patients may need a bigger boost to get moving — he thinks that perhaps close supervision by trainers or rewards for exercising will encourage genetic lazybones to get to the gym. And maybe one day, he speculates, there might even be a drug to compensate for what your genes won't give you. A drug that makes you want to exercise? Now that's a pill worth swallowing.

Why so serious?

2009-08-10T15:23:00.000+10:00

She fell down, hit her head on the counter...

then died.

Too soon

2009-08-10T14:32:00.002+10:00

Too soon we made peace, too soon, too soon...
Too soon we argued again, too soon, too soon.
When the slightest change in tone is taken as a slight,
when the smallest irritation causes you to snap and bite,

How can this be a bond fire and water cannot break?
How can these be ties of blood that the world can never shake?

When all the world is arrayed against us
and we need to come together to win the fight,
instead within the house we bide
the family snaps and snarls; their own they bite.
Ruin stands outside our door, and still no peace can be found;
Broken is the table round.

Perhaps the saddest thing is a family that does not value its own.

Twilight? Fie!

2009-07-31T16:06:00.001+10:00

No. Stop. Rewind. Pause. Just RIP THE DAMN DVD OUT AND DESTROY IT DAMMNIT! *stamp stamp crash shatter stomp bitchslap*

This would be one instance I would support that old misdeed of burning books and happily toss the entire Meyer collection of books into a blazing bonfire. The hotter the better. Anything to reduce that pathetic dribble to ashes as soon as possible. Then I would like to take the ashes apart molecule by molecule and destroy them some more.

Why do I feel so strongly about this series of books? Especially since I have been a vampire fanatic for years?

ONE: This series can hardly be compared to Anne Rice. It is badly-written, angsty (and not in a good way!), trite, and has the most puerile plot I have ever had the misfortune to encounter in years of sifting through crappy horror novels to find the few vampire gems on my treasured shelf. It reads like a Mary-Sue some poor thirteen-year old penned after being laughed at in high school.

Granted, reasons I dislike Twilight would also include the fact that I detest the way that my childhood treasures are being dug out of the literature and turned into fads that have legions of screaming fans screaming worship when they don’t understand their wonderful complexities in the first place. Yes, I am perverse, and delight in it. Case in point? Johnny Depp. How many of you even knew his name back when he was Edward Scissorhands and Don Juan? POP! One gig in Pirates of the Caribbean and everybody is a Depp fangirl. Lord of the Rings! How many of you got through the book before the movie came out? The copy I borrowed from the public library when I first read it in 1995 was printed in 1980, and had a mere two borrowers prior. I re-read it every year. I read the Hobbit, the Silmarillon, and as many of the more obscure books as I could find in the small town I grew up in. I wrote elven fanfiction and could tell you any number of obscure facts about Middle-Earth. When the movie came out I was saddened to see Glorfindel, my favourite character had not made it to the movie adaptation. All my hopes were on the second, Legolas, as I thought casting had done a fabulous job. Suddenly everyone was a Legolas fan. Another screaming legion of fangirls had been born. The worst thing was, almost none had read and appreciated the books. They didn’t know anything about him except he was a Prince. All the time I heard things like, “Oh wow, the blonde dude that played him, so cute! But why were his ears pointed?” Similarly, I refused to watch the Titanic until a year ago when I was bored and it was on TV. It wasn’t much good. So now, everyone loves vampires? And it’s Edward Cullen? Bring me a bucket. Quick!

That aside, my complaints about Twilight all come down to a few points. A very poor plot, and very bad writing. And it has utterly shamed all vampire lore. Come on, he sparkles? Why don’t you just light him up like a Christmas tree whilst you’re at it. And vampires are NOCTURNAL. That one undeniable fact that should never be varied has been broken. Vampires, such a piece of complex beautiful imagination, and all you can write about is the obsession of a teenage girl. Besides, the female protagonist is so utterly boring and without personality she could be a blow-up doll and no one would miss anything. What happened to the life questions, the struggles, the question whether immortality is truly what humans want even though it seems to be their Holy Grail? Oh no, it has been simplified to seem a good solution to any of Life’s problems.

I have, as mentioned, sifted through many stories and movies and TV series to feed my inner vampire. You like? Anne Rice (and you’ll have to read the books, not watch a movie to understand) is the undisputed queen. But even the clichéd TV serials that depict a vampire detective like Moonlight and Blood Ties are STILL better. I’m sorry, you couldn’t understand Anne Rice? Go back to school and when you learn to read, try again.

TWO: Have you read this, this, and this? Since one of the articles explains it ever so much more eloquently than I could, here is a reproduction of the said article for your perusal.

Twilight premiered last night. If you don't know what that means, the chances are that you are neither a teenage girl nor mother or teacher of same. If you were, you would know instantly that today is the day the first book in Stephanie Meyer's internationally bestselling vampire romance saga comes to the big screen. It tells the story of Isabella (Bella) Swan, a 17-year-old high school student, and Edward Cullen, who appears to be a similarly ordinary student but is in fact a 107-year-old member of the local undead community. They fall immediately, passionately and irrevocably in love but can never truly be together because, although Edward has renounced the drinking of human blood, the hunger remains and if he were ever truly to unleash his urges regarding Bella, he fears he would end up killing her rather than making sweet, sweet love.

The idea for the book came in a dream, says Meyer, a Mormon who performed the impressive feat of typing the subsequent 500-page narrative one-handed with a baby on her lap and two other children under five playing round her feet. Since that dream five years ago, three more books have followed and the tetralogy has sold more than 25m copies around the globe, spawning countless fans, websites and even Twilight tribute bands. The film took $70m (£47m) in its opening weekend in America and the latest hardback instalment of the saga, Breaking Dawn, will - like its predecessors - doubtless dominate the US bestseller lists for weeks.

Looking at the synopsis of Twilight, sceptics and cynics might ask if this was a dream that came to the author after she fell asleep in front of an episode of Joss Whedon's television series Buffy the Vampire Slayer, which also centred round the relationship between a high school girl and a "good" vampire who couldn't have sex for fear that he would turn evil again. Sceptics and cynics who have actually read Twilight or seen the film, however, will simply roll their eyes at their misguided brethren and say, "If only."

If only Meyer had taken Buffy as her template. If only she had used that groundbreaking series as her foundation and built on it. If only there was a Whedonesque intelligence and modern, feminist sensibility informing Twilight and its successors. If only.

What you have instead in Meyer's work is a depressingly retrograde, deeply anti-feminist, borderline misogynistic novel that drains its heroine of life and vitality as surely as if a vampire had sunk his teeth into her and leaves her a bloodless cipher while the story happens around her. Edward tells her she is "so interesting ... fascinating", but the reader looks in vain for his evidence.

Far more important, however, is the nature of the relationship between Bella and Edward. In interviews, Meyer claims that the theme of the Twilight saga is choice, because Edward chooses not to behave as his nature impels him to. Alas, the only choice Bella gets to make is to sacrifice herself in ever-larger increments. The book opens with her martyrish insistence on going to stay with her estranged father in Forks, Washington so that her flighty mother can go travelling with her new boyfriend. Once there, she swiftly takes over the cooking, cleaning and laundry for her father, and then we follow her through innumerable other acts of servitude and self-abnegation as she becomes more and more obsessed with her beautiful, bloodsucking boyfriend, culminating in the moment when she tells her friends and family that her plans with Edward have been cancelled (shortly before they head off to be alone together for the first time), so that if he does lose control and kill her, he won't be blamed. She's not Buffy, she's Patient Griselda, always spin-drying.

It sounds melodramatic and shrill to say that Bella and Edward's relationship is abusive, but as the story wears on it becomes increasingly hard to avoid the comparison, as she gradually isolates herself from her friends to protect his secret, and learns to subordinate her every impulse and movement to the necessity of not upsetting Edward and his instincts ("I could quite easily kill you, Bella, by accident"), until by halfway through she is trying to suppress her very pulse ("my blood was racing and I wished I could slow it, sensing that this must make everything so much more difficult") and planning her movements like a chess game - "I worried that it would provoke the strange anger that flared whenever I slipped and revealed too clearly how obsessed I was." Whenever she responds physically to his kisses, he immediately draws away and berates her. Supporters will call this the erotics of abstinence. I call it fear and distaste for female sexuality and a poisonous message to be feeding young women.

Edward, of course, has warned her not to be alone with him. He warns her constantly (in between praising her for the quietness with which she absorbs the latest revelation about his true vampiric nature) that she rouses him to such a pitch that he can barely contain himself. To Meyer and her legions of fans, this is evidence of his virtuous, gentlemanly nature. To those less enamoured of Meyerworld, the implication is that Bella chooses to put herself in danger and the further implication is that she must therefore bear full responsibility for the consequences (which, in the way of vampire romances, are not entirely confined to hugs and puppies). When she once confesses that she did find one of his outbursts of temper terrifying, he responds "You need a healthy dose of fear. Nothing could be more beneficial for you." To some, this counts as further proof that he wants to protect Bella from herself. To others, it all smacks uncomfortably of the "asking for it" defence. To the older and/or more savvy reader, Edward is less an ideal boyfriend than a proto-rapist.

In the book (though, naturally, less so in the film, as she is still physically present on screen), despite being the narrator, Bella all but disappears as a character. The few signs of wit and independence she exhibits at the beginning of the book, when she is starting her new school, have long been abandoned in favour of mute devotion to Edward, which by the end is so slavish that she asks him to turn her into a vampire too, so that he needn't be frightened of killing her any more.

Now, teenage readers - or viewers, although the film loses much of the written detail of Bella and Edward's relationship, which in this case could be classed as a good thing - aren't idiots. But they are young, inexperienced and underinformed, and that makes them vulnerable to influences they are exposed to uncritically. And the Twilight phenomenon has not, by and large, been objected to by adults, perhaps because they are aware only of the high concept of the saga and simply assume that, because the young protagonists have to avoid sex, their relationship can only be virtuous.

Edward is no hero. Bella is no Buffy. And Twilight's underlying message - that self-sacrifice makes you a worthy girlfriend, that men mustn't be excited beyond a certain point, that men with problems must be forgiven everything, that female passivity is a state to be encouraged - are no good to anyone. It should be staked through its black, black heart.

Yes, you screaming horde of teenage girls (and sadly, even those older…) who now all want a boyfriend “just like Edward” *cue cow eyes and some rather disturbing sighs of longing*.

Your Edward, is disturbing. And not in the sexy way you would like to think. He displays personality traits that real life men would be issued restraining orders for. He is undoubtedly a stalker, abusive, and disturbingly manipulative. And you would like to justify all his actions with “he is just trying to protect her, he loves her”. I’m sure abusive boyfriends tell that to their girlfriends all the time. Does this sound familiar? “It’s for your own good,” “It’s your fault,” “I’m only trying to protect you”. Your Edward, praises Bella for being bland, quiet, and generally personality-less. He speaks of his obsession for her, but any similar reaction on her part is rebuffed and shamed into oblivion. He controls what she does, follows her secretly, spies on her, intrudes on her personal space without qualm. Do you think that is normal? Maybe you need to watch Last Friends.

How would I know?

I know a couple like that. Closer to home than you think. You might know them too. He does that. Controls her. Psychs her into believing she’s in the wrong, the culprit, the one to blame. He is of course, only thinking of her benefit…

You ought to know better.

And am I the only one who sees Sousuke’s eyes in Edward?

THREE: Last but not least, the movie was so deadpan boring I couldn’t finish it even after two tries. Well, as a piece of entertainment, it has failed miserably.

So the next person who tries raving about Twilight with me is going to lose a limb. You have been warned.

Prologue

2009-07-31T14:38:00.001+10:00

Pride.

Oh what is pride?

Pride comes before a fall. The root of all evil is pride. Pride goeth before destruction, and a haughty spirit before a fall.

But I quote to you, “Pride in their port, defiance in their eye, I see the lords of humankind pass by”.

Can you tell me a saying more rousing than this one?

They say that you cannot always be strong, or perhaps that you cannot be strong all alone. The human in us needs comfort, company, and reassurance. And so pride that prevents us from showing a lack within ourselves is supposed to be our downfall. But I pose to you this question: Isn’t it also an inherently human trait to remember the weaknesses of others and use it against them? Not on purpose, or not always, but it happens often. How many times have you, in the heat of anger or the coldness of sorrow struck out at a loved one using a barb you know will damage, will burn, knowing all the while that you should not. But you do it anyway, unable to control the words pouring from your mouth in a foul vomit. Putrid. You wince even, but the damage is done. And seeing the hurt in their eyes, retreat behind defences and become even more… vile.

Apologies are too few and too late. The damage is done. They may smile and forgive you, but that wound will never heal.

The ice that forms over that hole in the frozen lake is thin and crackles dangerously under footsteps of even the lightest.

We instinctively protect our weaknesses from all eyes. Sometimes in loneliness, that wall may crumble and against our better judgement, the beans are spilled. But in the end, at the very bitter end, we will regret it. Paranoia, fear. Fear that it will be used against us. And when the day comes that it finally is, despair.

I have carried my burdens thus, safe and secret from all eyes, even my family, my spouse, my best friends, acquantainces, and colleagues. I have made life choices out of pride. Choices that were wrong. Choices that have set me down a path I do not recognise, where the road ahead is dark and bleak. But they were choices I made to shield my inner failings. I could not reveal my lack to the world, to friends who would judge me, to family who would be disappointed in me, to her whom, I fear, would leave me. No matter what they say, isn’t it innate in most women to seek a protector to help them navigate the rough decades of this world? No matter what, I have to be stronger, better, faster, smarter, more successful. I believe she will do her best for me, but there is a limit which can be reached in anyone. It isn’t shallow, it is nature and natural selection.

But this fear, it cripples me. I fear I will not recognise whom I have become soon. I will have lost myself, the essence of myself, and then, what point is there in hiding anymore? They will beat me down, and I will be left bleeding and broken, a mere shadow of whom I once was.

Is this pride, or fear?

I have to find a new path. But the first step is always the hardest. In turning away from the beaten road, and forcing open a difficult mountain goat trail, will I be setting myself up for disaster or success?

I will choose the road not taken, and let it take me where it may. After all, in the end, we are all but leaves upon the wind. And she is a fickle lady.

Daily Funnies

2009-07-23T22:35:00.001+10:00

Where else? FMyLife of course.

Today, I phoned one of the IT guys upstairs for help with my PC. He said it would only take a few minutes; and would just fix it through a direct connection from his computer to mine. Hours later; I was feeling devilish, and quickly checked out an adult website. Mr IT Guy was still connected. FML.

Today, after I cleaned out the fridge of things that expired months ago, my roommate got angry and insisted upon pulling all the moldy dairy products out of the garbage and putting them back because "they weren't mine and I shouldn't throw out other people's food. FML.

Today, I was standing by the bed naked, waiting for my wife to come out of the bathroom. She opens the door and walks over to me, swinging her hips, wearing practically nothing. About four feet from me, she trips on the edge of the floor mat, and uses my 'junk' to catch herself. FML.

Today, I was in the living room with my brother and his two older, hot friends when my mother walks out from the toilet and tells me, "Honey, if you sprinkle when you tinkle, be a sweetie wipe the seatie." Need I say more? FML

Today, I was taking a shower when my boyfriend suddenly hopped in with me. We were getting a little frisky when my mom's hand unexpectedly came through the curtain, and dropped a condom in the bottom of the shower, all the while saying, "Keep it safe kids!". FML.

Today, after my girlfriend of 2 years left me for another guy, I got stuck in an elevator for 3 hours. With both of them. FML.

Today, I went to the beach. I was in the ocean and I looked over my shoulder and saw a big black spot. Knowing that there were big crabs on the beach, I screamed. Everyone in the water heard including the lifeguards. It turns out it was just my shadow. FML.

Today, I was going to propose to my girlfriend on my boat at the lake. As we were looking at the mountains all around us, she playfully pushed me off the side into the water. As I got back on the boat, I realized that not only was my cellphone dead, but the ring had fallen into the deep water. FML.

Tender-Tough

2009-07-22T21:56:00.000+10:00

So is it better to be a delicate flower; intoxicating in its fragrance, delicate in its beauty, tender to the touch? But easily bruised, easily crushed, the thorns on its stem nonwithstanding. So what protection are thorns. Even though they may prick the hand that grabs, but the flower is still destroyed. It’s fragile petals bruised and bent.

Or you could be the shy weed. It is trodden upon, it closes its leaves, but within a minute or so they venture open again. It does not bruise, and when flattened, rises again. However you are constantly downtrodden, scorned, paid no respect. But I guess its resilience will survive many a storm.

Which is your pick?

Can you help it?

Tales of the Underwater

2009-07-21T21:54:00.002+10:00

Right.

So once upon a time, there was an expensive little Fish that lived in a moderately luxurious pond. Of course, there were other fish far more affluent that this one, but this expensive Fish was still quite satisfied with life; swimming round and round in the clean, temperature-controlled water, eating yummy fishy snacks, and occasionally popping over to see one of its neighbours in the nearby ponds.

However, the day drew nigh when the expensive Fish grew too big for the comfy little pond it had inhabited for so long and had to find a new home. So the little Fish set off on a Journey to find the new place it could belong to until the time came for its Second Journey. The little Fish had heard many stories about what the best type of pond was for expensive Fish, and the best way to get into one of those ponds. So the little Fish started planning the route it would take.

However, the Journey wasn’t quite as smooth as the little Fish had expected.

The little Fish hadn’t realised that the way would be so long and such rough-going. It had to swim through shallow rocky river beds that scraped and bruised the tender undersides of its belly till it bled. The way led also up many torrential rushing streams and even a waterfall or two. Sometimes, the way was murky, and gasping for breath, the little Fish had to turn back the way it had come, looking for another way around the obstacle.

All the time, other fish on their First Journeys passed it by.

Other fish even more expensive than the little Fish was spoke of the expensive large ponds left behind, in which they had been fed the most expensive and nutritional food to build up their stamina and muscles for this journey. Others spoke of mind-puzzles and obstacle courses built in their home ponds that they ran on a daily basis to prepare themselves for this day. All the expensive fish agreed that they had been groomed and prepared with the best backgrounds to race towards and claim a new expensive pond to dwell in; the First and most Important Journey. Little Fish watched them leap up streams and waterfalls it had not been able to conquer, and was quickly left behind.

There were the smaller, dull-coloured common fish also out on their First Journeys. Little Fish thought it might befriend them instead and have company along its journey, as it was beginning to feel pensive and lonesome. But these fish shunned the little Fish calling it “one of those”, stuck-up, and they didn’t share any common interests that could perhaps have bridged the gap. Little Fish wasn’t familiar with any of their games or interests, and the quick and wiry common fish swiftly darted off into the murky places it could not see or breathe in. When the little Fish came across other expensive fish as it moved further along, it tried to break through its shyness and befriend them. But the high-achieving expensive fish performed breathtaking athletics and scorned its peculiar taste in food. Poor little Fish, it had spent its life in its pond flicking to and fro, having fun, and eating whatever caught its fancy. It had been a good Fish, and listened to its parents, but no one had told it how to prepare for the First Journey.

The little Fish was very lonely by this time; it seemed it had been on the First Journey forever and a long time too. Little Fish dearly missed its three favourite neighbours, but some of them had made the trip before, and one was left behind. None had kept in contact with it, and it seemed, had no time to spare.

Continuing in a drooping and doleful fashion on its way, the little Fish finally came across the first ponds that it had seen. At first little Fish was delighted! Some pond owners would allow it a trial stay before they decided if the pond was for it, and begin their Second Life sojourn. But none of these ponds seemed to fit quite right. Entry to ponds of a standard it was used to required complex tests and trials, and little Fish was turned away. Some of the ponds it liked the look of turned out to be crummy and muddy on the inside, and struggling for breath, couldn’t help but leave. Little Fish never seemed to make a right decision. Ponds it chose always turned out to be bad for it. Hungering for nurture, it sadly crept out of them one by one, and began once more, the search for the place where it belonged.

Little Fish kept to the shadows now though, feeling ashamed to have failed its First Journey. It hid its head from other fish that passed by who had succeeded. Finally, weary and disheartened, the expensive little Fish crept under a hanging rock and shed hot tears of shame, loneliness, and dismay. How it missed its home Pond and the handful of friends it had made there. But it seemed one was always alone on this Life Journey, and no one else could help. The little Fish felt it could push its way forward seeking no longer, and appending doom to Life, it seemed the very water around it turned dark and still. So still in fact, that it almost seemed the little Fish had turned to stone in the little crevice underneath the rock.

One day, a large Tadpole swam up and attempted to squeeze under the same rock, causing the little Fish to start and move a little in agitation.

“Go away, this is my Place!” it burbled anxiously.

But the large Tadpole apologised for not seeing the little Fish, and somehow, managed to draw the lonely little Fish into conversation. Hungry for companionship, the two somehow became unlikely friends, the Tadpole sleeping in a little patch of seaweed not far from the rock. The large Tadpole had his own problems as well; the reason he was so large and yet not turned into a frog was because of a childhood nutritional deficiency. He had four legs, but that was the end of his transformation until today. But the large Tadpole was still older and wiser than anyone the expensive Fish had ever known, and it admired him greatly.

One day, after telling the large Tadpole about its failed Journey, he surprised the little Fish by saying:

“You know, it isn’t your fault that you couldn’t swim up raging rivers or into murky waters. You are an expensive Fish. Expensive Fish cannot survive in the murky water the common fish thrive in. Nor were you nurtured with the right materials that would make you as athletic as the Reared Expensive Fish. You were brought up in the most Natural way a Fish could wish for. Out there, there will be a Pond that is right for you, and you alone. It is not your fault for being born an Expensive Fish, with tender and delicate flesh. What you are was decided before you were ever born, by a power you cannot comprehend. And No One can blame you for what you are.”

The little Fish was startled speechless by the Tadpole’s words. It turned away and burrowed deeper into its little burrow under the rock, hiding the tears that crept to its eyes unbidden.

But a little corner of its mind began to cheer, and once more plans and routes began to form in its mind. Once more, the little Fish began to dream of its Pond, the one that was right for her.

The Rich Fish

2009-07-20T22:08:00.001+10:00

Have you heard a STM story?

There are two types of fishes. The expensive breeds can’t survive in muddy drain water. Whereas the stray cheap ones thrive, but rarely rise to better conditions. You can’t help it; you are either born one or the other, so don’t beat yourself up about it.

But perhaps with some practice and dipping your ~~feet~~ fins into murkier water every so often, one day you may find you have built up some resistance to it.

But the main point is, which one you are is a mere accident of birth.

Nokia Morph Concept

2009-07-18T00:29:00.000+10:00

Have you seen this? A little glimpse of the future.

Work Out

2009-07-09T02:52:00.001+10:00

Hot on the heels of Project Runway I watched yesterday was what I called “yet another reality show” about… a gym? And Arena said something about looking behind the scenes of Project Runway on Work Out. Now I haven’t seen any connection to Project Runway at all, but I was quite taken in by the show because of Jackie!

Jackie is hot.

She is what Ellen Degeneres should be, married to the flaming hot Porti De Rossi as she is. Ellen was always one step shy of being yeng somehow. Not sure if it’s the nose, or the balance between hard and soft is not quite there…

But Jackie is hot. Let me just get back to it.

Erica and newbie Jesse (?) are so proper, I love them.

Hated the stupid Brian, obviously has an overload of testosterone, wants to be Alpha Male of the pack (sadly isn’t qualified), doesn’t know how to do, only talk big. Wants the job, but won’t listen to the boss. Hates being bossed round by a woman… bullying the newbie… Jackie should just fire him. He thinks he’s God’s gift… and I can’t believe his way to make peace with Jackie was (wait for it…) to invite her to a strip club “because we share the same interest in women”. Ha-HA!

No one but Jackie will be the alpha at this pack (except perhaps Mimi). I love how she put off one of her clients who was trying to flirt with her suggesting her lesbianism was a phase.

I am so following this show…
Yes, probably because Jackie is hot. So sue me. She’s smoking! She’s even hotter than Pink can be in good angles.

But her girlfriend Mimi irks me.

And I note to my dismay after Googling it that in later seasons she has longer hair. Nooo… that spoils the whole androgynous thing.

Oh, and Jillian co-owns the place. The trainer from the Biggest Loser? Hmm…

And she only looks better on tv than in these photos. Huhu~

Project Runway Australia, Season 2

2009-07-09T02:07:00.001+10:00

-- SPOILER ALERTS --

So the first thing that struck me within the early minutes of the show is: people who think too highly of themselves are definitely getting kicked out. First picks: the guy (looked up his name: Jason) who said “I guess my design is more fashion-forward than Henry is used to”, and the curly-hired brunette who thinks she’s God’s gift to the fashion world (Amber). Surprise surprise. They are indeed two of the bottom three, and the same guy is eliminated. Amber? Probably needs to learn to read the brief properly. A glamorous evening gown ready for the red carpet that showcases who you are as a designer. Hers was more a mini you wear to a nightclub, and not finished well, busted zip aside.

The humblest, quietest person there who looks like a university lecturer (Mark) goes on to win the round.

So yesh, you are on Project Runway to showcase your skills, but you are also there to learn from important people in the industry. Take criticism, have your own thoughts, but don’t think that you are better than all of them.

And is it me or does the little Asian boy with funny hair (Anthony) look a lot like an imitation of Marc Antonio? Apparently more talented though, from the results of the first challenge.

I think Michael is quite fab as well, and with his beautiful long locks looks a little like a Raphaelite painting. Always a fan.

My favourite of the frocks tonight was actually William’s. Sure he had a little work to do on the seams, but time was limited. Most importantly, it was a beautiful unique gown, and very classy. Perfect for the red carpet.

… although Mark’s was definitely very unique with clean lines.

Succumbed to the tide of apples

2009-07-08T02:07:00.000+10:00

Yes, I have finally succumbed to the lure of Apple products.

My poor 12" Dell has been dying for some time now, blue screening every so often, and some motherboard problems. Since I am now entering the design world, it only made sense to go for a Mac since they are known for their strengths in that field.

So here I am with my 13" Macbook Pro.

It is heavier and less portable, and switching costs from Windows to Mac are high. Yes the Mac may be more stable, more powerful graphically, and other advantages that caused me to purchase it in the first place, but the OS is definitely much less intuitive than Windows. Figuring out how to install programs was a pain, and we have less control over where the file ends up. But the major problem was finding replacements for all the programs I use on a day-to-day basis on my Windows PC.

For one, Messenger for Mac sucks. There is no good replacement for Windows Live Messenger that has all the same functions. But I ended up with aMSN because it has most of the functions I need. I also can no longer use Windows Live Writer, or Microsoft ebook reader. *sigh*

On the other hand, there are a whole suite of programs out there for the Mac I have not explored yet. I am hoping for the best.

And figuring out how to use my new Wacom.

But hell, everything just looks more beautiful on the Mac screen!

Konnichiwa~

2009-07-07T21:20:00.001+10:00

I have finally taken the plunge and signed up for Japanese classes.

Step 1.

The goal?

Mastery over spoken and written Mandarin, Japanese, and Korean in three years.

Never seems to be enough time for anything, though.

Australia's Next Top Model Final

2009-07-07T20:36:00.013+10:00

-- SPOILER ALERTS --

Alex Perry still loves Clare to bits. I agree. What were the others thinking? There goes the most versatile, talented, gorgeous and professional girl. Well, hired for sure after the show.

Tahnee is gorgeous, absolutely smoking in the Alex Perry gown she appeared in. However, I think we all know she will be more limited than the other two by her figure. She will be Victoria's Secret perhaps, but she will be too big for many shows in the fashion industry. She even looks a little like one of the VS models. It is a pity though, because she has the most gorgeous catwalk of all three girls. And I agree with many of the judges that she looks more like a movie star than a model. She belongs on the red carpet.

And we all know what I think about Cassi by now, so we'll just skip that. Except for the fact that she cuts a gross figure in poor Alex Perry's gown. A really awkward figure, none of the languid liquid grace that Tahnee brought to hers.

Final comments? Not much. Here are some interesting tidbits though.

I find it hilarious that Cassi thinks she has an hourglass figure. She is flat and skinny, awkward, and her ribs show, her hipbones show, and she has a peculiar trunk. And she has a broken leg, shoulder, ankles, and what else have you, from the donkey's mouth.

Improved the most? We can't help it you had so much more things to improve upon than the other girls... I remember this argument about Alice Burdeu, that she did not show as much improvement as the other girls. But there was that gap: she was already excellent, and therefore had far less improvement to be made.

Clare was voted Australia's favourite. What does that show? That I am not the only one who thinks that she should have been final two. That is a moral commentary on the bad decisions that have been made that throughout, especially for a show that is trying to turn the bad reputation it earned last season around. I particularly loved that Clare even managed to look good in her Frankie impression little black wig. So pixie-ish!

Alex Perry... you are still the judge I respect the most. But I am disappointed with your decision. Nature may have seen fit to bless Cassi with good bone structure, but as you said, Cassi is the type of girl that could book a show and not go to work, just because she doesn't feel like going. Giving your vote to her, you have contributed to robbing Clare and Tahnee of the opportunity they took into their own hands, worked hard for, and earned.

Dawson's vote was unexpected, but welcome. And it is a good point, though she may take flak for it. It's true. The bogan would probably Britney Spears-like give up everything settle down and pop out children before she's ready for them.

And I don't want Cassi to represent Victoria. Ew.

I note they pointedly did not show the footage of Cassi's worst moments. The bullying tendencies, especially the scene where she barged into the shower and threatened Clare with bodily harm. I guess they did learn one thing from last season.

Thank god the right person won. I was about to hang myself when Cassi got 4 votes out of 7. But Clare was still robbed of her right to be final 2. Robbed!

BlueFire Grill, Docklands

2009-07-03T19:19:00.000+10:00

Is actually not too bad. I don’t know why it seems to have a somewhat less than desirable rep. It isn’t on par with some of the other restaurants we’ve been too, but it has good solid food overall.

We went in April, for a quick dinner before going off to watch Cirque du Soleil in action. I’ve finally dredged the photos from my camera, so here you go.

Smoked salmon with cream cheese, capers, onions and chives $17.00
Not bad at all. But very much overshadowed by the...

Pan seared Hokkaido scallops with caramelized shallots,
spinach, tomato and lime salsa $18.00
Every bit as good as it looks. Maybe better. The scallops were beautiful!

Mango juice

Stanley's Amaretto / Whiskey Sour
Amaretto or Whiskey and Cointreau shaken & strained over ice. Served in a sugar rimmed glass with a maraschino cherry $9.00

My 'cocktail for the designated driver' Cotton Candy
Monin rose, apple juice, cranberry juice with a squeeze of lime $7.50 - Really fragrant!

Chargrilled MSA porterhouse over garlic mash potato, caponata and lemon $34.00
As you can probably tell, we tucked in before remembering the photo, thus the messy sauce trail... This was alright, but the mash was a surprising winner. I couldn't stop stealing it.

I had the Churrascaria tasting plate: A selection of meat & seafood from
our grill served with vegetables & condiments $34.00
Some of the bits were really good, and some were rather meh...

Overall, a pretty solid experience. I would go back for a simple dinner, but it doesn’t rate that highly on my list.

BlueFire Grill, Docklands
G17-18, 427 Docklands Drive,
Waterfront City, Docklands, VIC 3008.
[T] 03 9670 8008
www.bluefiregrill.com.au

Egg Cravings

2009-07-02T15:43:00.000+10:00

Are you like me?

Do you love eggs with a fiery burning passion?

LOL. Actually we’ve run out of eggs and I am craving some.

One of my favourite ways to eat the humble tamago is just to 3/4 boil them, mash them up with butter, sea salt, freshly cracked black pepper and mayonnaise. I could do without the bread though. Haha.

I also love them poached, sunny-side-up, sweet steamed, savoury steamed, baked, tamagoyaki, chawanmushi … scrambled is probably my least favoured approach, but still okay.

What is your favourite way to eat eggs?

The Legacy of Australia’s Next Top Model Season 4

2009-07-01T12:30:00.001+10:00

Article reproduced from here.

SO, LIKE, wow, another bitch has been born unto the Australian fashion industry.

Foxtel's reality series Australia's Next Top Model has crowned its latest style queen, 16-year-old Demelza Reveley of Wollongong.

Her fans will tell you the teen beauty triumphed over the odds, beating off the fat police who forced her to shed the kilos to fit in.

Poor Demelza, batting those saucer-like eyes, was the victim of those bullies in the human cattle trade who don't like their clotheshorses to carry too much weight.

We had the "too fat" headlines, tugging at heart strings and those tendons of insecurity most women have about their own size.

The orchestrated publicity campaign to canonise Demelza as the patron saint of the set-upon plus-sizes would have been convincing if it weren't so obvious to anyone with a millimetre of experience in fashion that she was not too big for the business but rather turned down because of her inflated sense of entitlement at any cost.

And that's the most galling part of Demelza's win: How this obnoxious bully prospered.

The spin doctors win again and the rag trade takes another hit as the domain for petulant princesses.

Producers can try to distance themselves from endorsing the woeful example Demelza set for the show's impressionable young audience.

The viewers decide, of course. But her future was in their hands.

It was in the editing suite, when producers chose to let the "reality" of Demelza monstering her fellow contestant Alamela Rowan to the point of breakdown.

This was not just teen teasing, it was physical and dangerous viewing.

There was the name-calling from judge Charlotte Dawson, who dubbed Demelza and her self-titled band of bullying "bitchketeers" the "Dapto Dogs".

But the weeks of traumatising Alamela for TV ratings ultimately went to air, instead of being pulled - as Demelza should have been - from the contest.

Rowan's father Peter has since claimed that his daughter, also of high school age, was "gagged" by producers in the fallout from the scandal, while Demelza was trotted out on a current affairs show to offer her sincere apology.

Not one accepted by Alamela, it must be noted, who left Foxtel's studios soon after the decision on Tuesday night in tears.

The response to Demelza's Daily Telegraph blog yesterday showed hundreds of viewers also wept.

Parents lamented the benchmark it sets for their daughters about the way bad behaviour goes unpunished.

And the young girls looking to the show to help them in their fight against the Demelzas of their own pubescent torment were left deflated.

"I am absolutely disgusted they've rewarded this horribly nasty girl with this prize. Well done Australia, and Fox8, for showing that bullies always prosper. Sucked in to the little guy. Disgraceful," wrote Emme of Sydney.

"The girl just LOOKS like a bitch. Ah well, works for Naomi Campbell," Dave C. of the Blue Mountains posted.

On the show's website, one mother vowed never to watch again, in a forum called "Shame on you ANTM"."My daughter and I had a lot of fun watching ANTM together, but both of us felt physically ill after the bully episode . . . the rehabilitation of Demelza that was attempted at the final was an insult to the intelligence of the fans of this show."

Beauty pageant aside, the founder of School Angels, an anti-bully campaign, Andrew Stoop sees a seriously ugly future beyond this contest.

"Next time we are left wondering why kids are assaulting kids, maybe we should remember that we are creating them with attitudes like this," he wrote.

"We have a terrible youth culture developing in Australia of kids hurting kids and this girl winning has reinforced that it's not only OK to bully, but you will be a winner in the end if you do."

Of course, not wanting to further the cycle of abuse, Demelza may just learn from the backlash and change her ways.

By industry standards, she will need to.

Vogue Australia editor and judge Kirstie Clements stood tall as an expert voice of reason during the series grand final, denying Demelza her vote of approval.

"She wasn't a team player and her attitude was just not good enough," Clements said yesterday.

"I don't think it fits with the brand values of Vogue and I had a lot, and I mean a lot, of letters from readers - parents and professionals from schools - writing in about (the bullying). I couldn't ignore that."

Clements will honour the terms of the magazine's contract to shoot the winner for an upcoming issue.

But she tellingly added that Demelza's "infamy, not beauty, won out".

And infamy, just like beauty, can be fleeting.

Article reproduced from here.

She was bullied and branded a "prissy bitch" by her rivals but former Australia's Next Top Model beauty Alamela Rowan has had the last laugh, according to series judge Charlotte Dawson.

The 18-year-old red head has booked a string of modelling jobs across Asia while her tormentor, series winner Demelza Reveley, has failed to crack the cut-throat overseas market.

"Alamela is not afraid of the competition and she's out there pursuing work, " Dawson told ninemsn.

"Let's face it, [Alamela's] in Asia, she's three-dress sizes smaller than Demelza, so she can work there because she's got the body."

Dawson, whose critical opinion often divides viewers of the show, said Rowan's overseas jaunts proved success really was the best revenge.

Reveley's agent Priscilla Leighton Clarke said her client's dreams of becoming an international success had not been fulfilled.

The 16-year-old recently became the face of Sydney's antiquated Strand Arcade and modelled make-up for cosmetics kingpin Napoleon. Rowan, meanwhile, is in demand overseas.

"One of my favourite jobs was modelling a $38,000 watch hand-crafted from iron recovered from the Titanic," Rowan told ninemsn, just hours before boarding a plane from Singapore to Taiwan.

"My current contract in Taiwan will be completed in July and then I'm being sent to Thailand.

"I've mainly been doing commercial work and have modelled for clients like Moshi Moshi jewellers, Levis and alldressedup."

She also booked a gig with British Hairdresser of the Year Angelo Seminara and was chosen to walk the catwalk on Project Runway Australia. Although she is working overseas, Rowan has yet to make it as big as the 2007 winner Alice Burdeu, a porcelain-faced beauty who has become a fixture on catwalks in Singapore, London and Milan.

"Alice was the most successful winner from any Top Model series but Demelza is very different," Leighton-Clarke told ninemsn.

"Alice was a huge success and Demelza has big shoes to fill."

As part of the Next Top Model prize, Reveley shot an eight-page spread for fashion bible Vogue but, unlike Burdeu, missed out on appearing on the prized cover. She recently dressed up as Alice in Wonderland for a shoot with Sydney Arcade.

It was not mentioned though, that in that Vogue spread, the editor titled it: “Demelza: Top Model? You decide”… or something very similar. What a dig. Alamela and the beautiful red head Caris that got eliminated were my favourites, and I was devastated. So that was Season 4, a serious error in judgement. And Alamela being labelled a “prissy bitch”, does that sound familiar?

Season 3, Jodhi wanted to push her favourite Stef to win, and butted everyone out of her way. Thank god Alice won. Who was also bullied in the house as well! Of course, since Burdeu has made it so big in the fashion world, everyone has conveniently forgotten about that fact and has convinced themselves they were on her side in the first place. Yes?

Season 5? Cassi threatened Clare with bodily harm (and she is such a psycho, she is scary!), she’s still here. Clare, the beautiful, ethereal, elven-like 16yo who has been consistent and professional throughout the show and booked the most shows at Fashion week is eliminated. And labelled “Nanna” and “Prissy Princess” once again. The judges need to remember, even though Cassi may become a model, they are also choosing, in a manner of speaking, a face to represent Australia. I for one, would stick my head in the sand if Cassi becomes that face. Clare and Tahnee definitely deserved to be in the final two, and although Clare is my favourite, Tahnee would be a deserving winner. I can see her in Victoria’s Secret shows, just like she wanted. But I am terribly, terribly disappointed that Clare did not get her chance!

Hopefully, history will repeat itself. Cassi will achieve no great fame and be forgotten. And Clare will get what she deserves and make it big internationally.

P.S.: Read Alamela’s blog on Season 5 of Australia’s Next Top Model here.

Next Top Model Finalists

2009-06-30T20:48:00.001+10:00

Come ON!!!

Clare out of the final two? She’s been final two since DAY ONE!

I CANNOT FREAKIN’ BELIEVE CASSI IS IN FINAL TWO! WHAT, DO THE JUDGES THINK AUSTRALIA LOVES BADLY-BEHAVED IDIOTS? Demelza winning last season was bad enough, but in all honesty she didn’t have that much competition. But you have the strongest two here, Clare and Tahnee, and you let Cassie go into final two. WTF??? WTH!!! *rant* *hulkrage* *smashes things* *pastes Cassi’s fugly face on a voodoo doll and sticks it full of pins*

What Clare said when she went out was EXACTLY right. Australia’s Next Top Model this season was supposed to undergo a change, what with the old host championing Demelza albeit her ugly behaviour and really showing such favoritism on the show it was a laugh. So enter Sarah Murdoch. Lots of more structured, healthy activities, a new emphasis on good professional behaviour, good model behaviour, good morals. And she gets overruled about Cassi’s unstability and they let her into final two. I am SO disappointed!

I hate Cassi! She’s a bogan, she’s mentally unstable, she has anger management issues. She has to be the most shallow, badly behaved, awkward, ungainly, weird-looking… I could run on for ages. C’mon! She has crooked teeth, she looks peculiar at the best of times, and she walks with a lopsided awkward gait like a lame horse. And of course she is the furthest thing from classy ever. Trailer park material. Seriously. I am so pissed off. So the show is championing bad behaviour now I suppose. What’s the lesson: the most vicious, worst-behaved people win at life?

Fuck that.

I hate Australia’s Next Top Model after Alice Burdeu. Who got bullied as well. And they wonder why it is such a problem in their schools.

Tahnee better win.

The other possibility is just unthinkable.

Did I mention Clare booked all her shows in Fashion Week except one, the swimwear one??? All?!? Tahnee scored ONE, Cassi TWO. That’s IT. And read this.

It would appear on ANTM if you show half a brain or an inclination to study you are going to be portrayed as stuck up as Alamela Rowen was in last years show. This is not great role modelling by the show’s producers, since a high proportion of their audience is younger girls.

Way to go. Promoting Australia’s girls, some of the most beautiful in the world, as only able to achieve the standard of Cassi??? So… about Demelza, who has heard of her after she won anyway? Huh??

Come on seriously, you picked >>right<< over >>left<<?

You’re telling me a portfolio like this isn’t worthy of final two in Australia’s Next Top Model? Huh???

You must think we’re all stupid, to value drama over talent.

Edit: Cassi may become a model. There's no doubt about it that she can sometimes take some beautiful pictures. HOwever, she can't walk to save her life. Her body looks rather awkward at times. And this being Australia's Next Top Model, they are in a way choosing a girl who will for a while, be the face of Australia, representing us. That is why the attitude and personality is important, although not trumping model potential. And simply put, Clare has trumped Cassi all season. In bookings, in photos, in attitude, and professionalism. THAT is why many of us are dismayed, as it appears that Cassi is still there regardless of her her attitude and performance, due to favouritism.

Laptop Transformers

2009-06-30T16:51:00.000+10:00

This is awesome.

Cumulus Inc

2009-06-29T14:46:00.002+10:00

I was very excited to finally be going to Cumulus – I’ve been meaning to go for ages, but never found the right time or people.

And then we phoned to try to make a booking and realised they don’t take bookings for under eight. LOL. But it was fine, since both me and STM managed to leave work quite early and walked in to have a drink whilst waiting for a table. Oh, it is far easier to get a table for four than six though, but after some time we all found ourselves seated in a row at the bar. Our waiter / bartender for the evening was very friendly and guided us through the ordering process with good advice.

We decided to get two soups between four of us, and scallops for each. Of course, I forgot the take photos of the soups again, but they were quite special! We had the salt cod soup with parsley, which was my personal favourite. Warm thick salted cod soup topped with a chilled green layer of parsley puree… the contrast was yum! We also had the soup of the day, which was blue swimmer crab, which had crispy chicken bites inside - which were still crispy even after being submerged in soup.

Scallops wrapped in speck, caper, and raisin vinaigrette followed.

This was urhh... rabbit-look-a-like toast, balsamic salad, olive puree of
some sort, and a house-made mild, soft cheese.

Yes, I forgot what it was called, thankyouverymuch.

Whole slow roast lamb shoulder to share. And it was BIG.
Shared amongst six people and we were still really full by the end.

It came with a nice little raw red onion salad and a slice of lemon,
which cut through the rich fattiness of the lamb very well.

Cracked wheat and freekeh salad, preserved lemon, barberries.
I heard this came highly recommended, and I am in love…

New potatoes, sage, confit garlic & lemon.

We were too full at the end of it to have any dessert, a pity because I heard a lot about their madeleines. STM definitely wants to go back again to try their selection of oysters, and I will have a chance then, and at their charcuterie as well! Again, surprisingly reasonable. Cost per head minus drinks was roughly $28. Someone had an eye-popping $5 bottle of mineral water though. Must have been one of those really fancy ones…

A nice little touch was the leg room at the bar, which is usually non-existent, and convenient hooks for bags or coats.

Cumulus Inc
45 Flinders Lane, Melbourne, VIC 3000
[T] 03 9650 1445
www.cumulusinc.com.au

The King is Dead

2009-06-28T16:17:00.001+10:00

Michael Jackson, The King of Pop… the only man capable of crashing Google?

RIP Michael "The only man capable of crashing Google" Jackson

"Search giant Google confirmed to the BBC that when the news first broke it feared it was under attack. Millions of people who Googled the star's name were greeted with an error page rather than a list of results."

Source.

There’s been much news and much debate about the death of the King of Pop, but this is certainly the most interesting.

What use is it to debate his flaws now? The media is like carrion-eaters.

Tragic personal life and the Peter Pan complex aside, no modern singer has ever reached his height of popularity for the same amount of time. We are an era of one-hit wonders and surgically enhanced teenage girls too old for their years. There is no competition.

Edit: This is hilarious!

When I first heard about this, I was really hoping it would have been a publicity stunt for his upcoming tour.

I had this whole thing mapped out in my head... He's laying in the hospital bed, the heart meter flatlines then starts breaking up to the beat of Thriller. His "lifeless" body starts twitching to the beat, then BAM, he jumps off the bed in full effect while the music track cues. The hospital staff (who are really professional dancers) is obviously in on this and they jump into position as back up dancers. As they dance and make their way outside, they're immediately picked up by the major news networks giving him instant and worldwide recognition. The dance ends and they freeze in position while a giant banner swoops down out of seemingly nowhere with the name of the tour.

Source.

The reason behind the madness

2009-06-28T14:28:00.002+10:00

Someone asked me today, why would I publish some of these reviews whilst they are still here? Shouldn’t I keep my secrets until they are gone? After all, it isn’t long to wait…

My reason is not impatience.

Impatience, hot blood, something done on the spur of the moment, in the heat of madness, with the boil of blood drumming in your ears…

They are not reasons, but imprudence. And from imprudence, you lose things. Money, face, reputation, etcetera.

The reason is plain and simple:

It pleases me to know if they attend from reading about it from what I write or post, they are beholden to me for I gave them the knowledge from the palm of my hand. And they will not be able to forget that. And it pleases me to know that they are still dwelling on the past, for why else would they read it?

Vindictive?
You have no idea.

“When life gives you lemons, make lemonade.”

Hibachi Japanese Grill

2009-06-27T23:54:00.001+10:00

STM and I had a foiled attempt to go to Hwaro Korean BBQ yesterday - we didn’t think just two people having an early dinner would need to book! After all dining in a couple is fairly easy, we can sit at the counter and dine, and are therefore fitted into almost any restaurant fairly easily. After all, this tactic has worked for us twice at the forever-booked-out Hellenic Republic.

STM and I didn’t want to repark the car after emptying all the 5c coins he had into the machine, and ended up walking around the area to scope out some other dinner place. We stumbled across this cute little place called Hibachi Japanese Grill. It has a nice exterior, and inside looks a bit like those small roadside eateries you always see in Japanese dramas with a bar, sushi area, and grilling area for the small Japanese skewers they like to eat with beer after work. I was still a bit ticked off at not being able to eat at Hwaro, but the menu and the food that came out quickly changed my mind.

After dinner, I came straight home and googled the place, wondering why I had never heard of it before. I mean, a place that good would definitely have been reviewed in one of the many food blogs I peruse, or talked about amongst my foodie friends. No results on google… until today when I finally found their website and found out why. It’s pretty new! Just opened recently. The owner is a Hongky guy, and they employ quite a few Malaysians from the conversation I heard whilst dining. I think I overheard one of the sushi chefs used to work in Shangri-La.

There’s even a 10% discount on Mondays to Wednesdays on at the moment for their grand opening (according to their website). I suspect the owner must be quite well known in the restaurant business because there were many, many customers they were greeting by name when they entered, appearing to know them well. One couple even got the royal treatment: a planned menu specially for them, and the head chef came out to be personally introduced… *envy*

They served us a free amuse-bouche, a beautifully fresh and sweet cube of tofu in what I suspect was dashi topped with ground spicy ginger and some spring onions. Which of course, me being me, the I forgot to photograph in my eagerness to tuck in. And this is why I will never be a real food blogger. Haha!

Osuimono - Dashi consommé w/ prawn, clams, fish, kamaboko & mushroom.
Very sweet and light. A beautiful start.

The sauce that came with the first robata-yaki we ordered.
A sweet mirin(?) with sesame seeds. Very good with the hotate. And fun to play with.

Hotate to becon yaki - The first robata-yaki, scallops wrapped in bacon.
Quite fabulous, especially with the sauce. And swimmingly fresh and clean. Even the pickles were awesome.

Gyuniku shogayaki - Scotch fillet cooked in traditional ginger sauce.
This was somewhat ordinary. Heard being explained behind us that Hibachi makes all the sauces they use in their cooking themselves.

Sakana shioyaki – Salmon fillet grilled with salt.
A very delicate flavour that brought out the salmon. And a surprising winner - the seaweed salad served on the side was amazing.

Ika teriyaki – Grilled squid with teriyaki & wasabi aioli served on hot plate.
It was indeed grilled to perfection, just short of fully cooked and beautifully tender. Again, a winning salad dressing.

And then we started getting greedy listening and watching other people order around us. Since they seemed to be famous for the robata-yaki, we decided to go all out and order two more skewers for each of us.

Lamb rack miso yaki – Grilled lamb rack with miso dressing.
This was pleasant, but not as eye-popping as some of their other dishes.

Sanma – Grilled pike mackeral.
This surprised me with how big is was for a skewer. And it was excellent. The fragrant, oily pike mackeral really took on the flavour of the grill, and even the salt seemed smoky and delicious. A very pleasant end to the evening.

And good news! The prices are quite reasonable! The damage amounted to about $112 for the both of us. We will definitely be back to try some of their other items soon, right after I book a table at Hwaro for this Friday. I suspect their sushi will be good, as all their seafood dishes were very fresh and done to perfection.

Hibachi Japanese Grill
230 King St, Melbourne VIC
[T] (03) 9642 5448
www.hibachi.com.au

Shopping shopping shopping…

2009-06-24T23:04:00.001+10:00

I am so addicted to shopping. But I have no money. Well, window-shopping online is almost as good. But it is such temptation!

Came across this interesting website today, Reebonz. It’s a programme by referral only, wonder if this is a marketing tactic to show its “exclusivity”. Regardless, they apparently have pretty good events when chosen brands will go on a pretty massive price-cut for a few days at a time! If you’re bored or just have itchy fingers right now, check it out!

I’ve also added a new little widget bottom right. Shopping sites! I’ve found quite a few sites with some beautiful unique products. Even if I can’t afford to buy most of them, they have all gained spots on my wishlist. I thought I’d share the ~~temptation~~ joy.

Busy window-shopping again

2009-06-24T03:01:00.002+10:00

Yunno some of these Korean / Taiwanese online clothes shops have the most interesting things. In fact, they’re pretty great except for one thing: SIZES.

I mean, yes of course they tend to be smaller. But there is a limit to smaller… I mean, c’mon, bust size 18 inches? What are you, 9? Grr…

And if you’re catering to an overseas crowd… for god’s sake, get more sizes upwards of that 18 inches. As far as I know, I’ve seen bras start at 28” or so and go up from there. Seriously, 18 inches, that’s like what, one boob? LOL.

And no, that wasn’t the measurement of the shirt laid flat. It was the circumference.

Am I the only one who thinks there’s something wrong here?

Ok, so it was just one that was 18”, but still…!!!

Her Morning Elegance

2009-06-18T23:06:00.000+10:00

Oren Lavie – Her Morning Elegance

I love.

Don’t you feel like that sometimes?

Osen [jdorama]

2009-06-17T22:18:00.000+10:00

I am quite fond of this quaint little jdorama: Osen.

It’s about food (what could be better?) and tradition, and a kick against ultra-modernisation and overuse of technology.

It’s a play on the sweet sadness of being overly caught up in the tide of modernisation and consequently losing culture, losing tradition, losing identity and the pride in hard done handiwork.

It’s opening song and video is also quite inspiring. There’s an idea for a story. Isn’t she gorgeous?

Sony Ericsson XPERIA X1

2009-06-15T20:40:00.000+10:00

Yes, I finally got my new baby from 3. And finally this whole loyalty bonus thing actually does something and I got it very CHEAP too! :D And yes, I know this phone was released ages ago, but yunno Aussieland gets its tech not-very-fast…

Take that iPhone. I still don’t like you. Even if a certain mammal living in Iceland does. LOL.

Ooh look, I even found a picture with you on it. Get back off the Apple bandwagon you… you… defector, you! :P

And if anyone like me has problems waking up in the morning and has a Windows Mobile, this little gem is for you. It makes you do puzzles before you can switch it off! Hoho. And I love that syncing everything on this does not require programs, just whatever exists on your current Windows computer. Love it. Thank you very much.

Joss Whedon is God

2009-06-14T21:10:00.000+10:00

Have you heard of the Dollhouse?

Joss Whedon produces “cult” television series, with good reason. Yes, Buffy was occasionally trite, and not always a hit, but because the storyline had such potential, and some characters were so engaging, it achieved cult status. It inspired imagination, and some beautiful fan fiction. The Dollhouse looks like it stands to do the same.

--SPOILER ALERTS--

A good build of mystery, curiousity, and engagement. I am looking for fanfiction right now. I bet it’s going to be great. I was a bit disappointed in Alpha, perhaps, it was a letdown as to how that played out when I had built him up to be beautiful, cutting, intelligent… and he ended up well… the way he did. So I’m past Alpha as a threat, but I am looking forward to Season 2 now that Echo has really awakened!

And Dichen Lachman is hot. Australian and Tibetan! Look at her! She’s hotter than Eliza Dushku, which takes some doing… I absolutely loved Dushku as Faith in Buffy, and wished she had more screen time. She does a good job in the Dollhouse as well, and can look admirably blank as Echo, but she is utterly overshadowed by Lachman as Sierra, IMHO.

I am also a great fan of Adele Dewitt. So icy. Somehow it is reminiscent of La Femme Nikita, that other cult TV series. I loved the episode when she and Topher got all drugged up. It is such contrasts in her character that make it easy to connect.

And Boyd… ah, such potential there. Must-see-more-developments-here!!!

The series sped along at quite a rate, I thought it could have been longer and more drawn-out, but perhaps this is necessary to keep the short attention spans of audiences these days. But I am very glad it has been renewed for Season 2, and I CAN’T WAIT!

Whatever has happened to Kyle XY and True Blood as well???

An-nyung~

2009-06-14T20:31:00.001+10:00

An-nyung-ha-se-yo (안녕하세요)…

Since everyone thinks I’m Korean now, I might as well speak like one too. :P

Oh, my tongue is burning!

2009-06-13T20:10:00.000+10:00

Siapa yang termakan cili, terasalah pedasnya.

Isn’t that how the saying goes?

LOL. Actions brought to my attention recently just goes to show someone just ate a cili padi and they are reaaally feeling the effects. Thus the defensive mechanisms and posts all coming up. Hoho. Just goes to show. You can take the problem out of the house, but you really can’t take it out of yourself…

Real-life Gambit

2009-06-08T21:32:00.001+10:00

No, not gambit as in “an opening remark intended to secure an advantage for the speaker”, nor a “conversational ploy”. Neither is it a “chess move early in the game in which the player sacrifices minor pieces in order to obtain an advantageous position”. I am here referring to the character Gambit from the X-Men.

“Gambit is a mutant whose primary ability is the manipulation of potential or kinetic energy. This is manifested both internally and externally, energy charges his body giving him greater strength, stamina, and agility than any non-powered human, as well as being able to charge matter resulting in the violent and powerful explosion of said matter through touch. The objects that he charges explode with a force somewhat proportional to the size of the object, though a playing card is as powerful as a hand grenade in Gambit's hands. Gambit has the ability to charge living as well as non living matter, though this ability is the source of much controversy in Gambit's life as well as the continuity and nature of the character. He almost never charges organic matter. Gambit is skilled in card throwing with great accuracy, and all aspects of thievery. One of his trademark tricks is to hurl playing cards at an opponent, charging each card and turning it into a deadly projectile. His weapon of choice is a telescopic metal staff.” Source: Wikipedia.

Flipping through the channels on holiday recently I ran across a feature on a card-throwing expert. I couldn’t find the exact feature, but it features some pretty awesome demonstrations of accuracy and amazing projection. The first thing that ran across my mind was of course… a real-life Gambit. I remember when I was younger attempting to learn to throw cards as well because Gambit was my favourite character. Hehe.

He even has his own website and holds the record for the farthest card throw ever in the Guinness Book of Records. Cool huh?

Easy to Spot

2009-06-02T20:05:00.000+10:00

Yes, it is very easy to spot one of those young generation Y employees that have given the rest of us such a bad name with employers. Just watch the reactions of two different people to a similar situation. The generation X-er maintains a dignified silence for the public. Inside, the person will think carefully about what was done wrong, and what was done right, and also acknowledge any personal wrong-doing. A mature, logical sequence of thought.

The younger generation Y-er twitters and babbles about all the imagined sins committed against them – every hour, every day. It is a badge of pride they wear, to air dirty laundry in public. There is no private reflection. They are always assured that they are the smartest, the most eloquent, and most importantly, right. Unlike the generation X-er, there is no thought given to whether some percentage of the problem was self-inflicted. To the generation Y-er, society owes them something. Everything. Everything they ask for must be given. They walk around with giant chips on their shoulders. They jump into situations with no thought, and then blame others for any discomfort they find in the surroundings that they inflicted upon themselves. In short, they can be likened most to the spoilt, youngest children in a family.

Even with my current employer, we had a conversation about the different generation employees in the company. They were beleaguered by “bad eggs” from the generation Y-ers they had tried to employ. “Except you and Liss, of course,” they smiled. But the complaints were the same. Expectations. No work ethic. The expectation that they were owed something by their employers. They weren’t there to help the company. They were there for the company to help them. Everything was not their fault. It was the fault of lack of teaching, or some other problem they conjured up in their minds. Invisible problems and imagined faults against their person.

I am reluctant to say it, but I am truly ashamed to be a generation Y-er today. The reputation that follows us is less than desirable. If only I had made it into Generation X instead… which I identify with wholeheartedly.

Edit: Ooh, wikipedia could also reclassify me as the MTV subgeneration. Now if this was acknowledged widely, I could perhaps shed the cloak of the Gen Y.

Article that follows is reproduced from here.

Generation X: the letter "X" originally suggested the ambiguous, misunderstood, disheartened generation. The ambiguity has since been clearly defined, so its alternative name Thirteenth Generation (we are the thirteenth generation since the founding of the country) should be more appropriately used. Gen X can be described as growing up with MTV, Pac Man and The Breakfast Club. Pressed between two large generations of the Baby Boomers and Gen Y, Gen X is also characterized with having the middle child syndrome - always being ignored and underappreciated. Like sibling rivalry, with Boomers as the self-righteous eldest and Millennials as the pampered baby with a sense of entitlement. The media has focused a lot of its attention on the Baby Boomers entering into retirement, social security problems, health issues and the rise of biotech. With even more spotlight, the media is fascinated with tabloids of today’s youth, their lifestyle, their relationships, and more of the same monotony. Gen X are feeling overlooked and invisible. So we have a generational chip on our shoulders, but how about coverage on success of a X turning 40, X icons, or X as a technologically influential generation? Is it too much to ask for more face time, more visibility, more recognition?

Generation Y: the offsprings of the Baby Boomers make up of today's teens and twenty-somethings. They love fame, celebrities, technology, brand names, and six degrees of separation through social networks. Somewhat ironic, Millennials inherited and benefited from the creation of Gen X platforms such as Google, YouTube, MySpace, and Amazon which are largely responsible for classifying this generation as the Internet Generation. This is a large population of 76 million people who are technically savvy and can be powerful because of their ability to connect to each other. With their sense of empowerment, they demand “I want what I want when, where and how I want it.” Quick access to information, to communication equate to instant gratification. This generation’s easy access to a plethora of information can be an overload. This trend will continue to a great degree onto Generation Z.

Generation Z: the future of our tomorrow who are predominantly the children of Gen X. This is a very young generation with the oldest at 12 years old. Despite their young age, the characteristics of this generation are quite apparent. They are exposed to technology very early in their lives and most already have an online identity. They are considered the most stressful generation for their involvement in too many extra-curricular activities – piano lesson, tap dancing, swimming, soccer practice, singing class, etc. With the rigid schedule of daily activities, they sometime forget to be children.

There is no doubt that each generational difference is marked uniquely. The previous generation lays the path for the next. Of course, conflicts between generations are commonplace as one generation expects conformity from the other generation. This would indubitably make our relationships less complicated, but that is not reality. The reality is that generational differences should be embraced, accepted and respected.

List of generations can be found here.

1942-1953: The Baby Boom Generation was the generation born just after World War II, a time that included a 14-year increase in birthrate worldwide. Baby Boomers in their teenage and college years were characteristically part of the 1960s counterculture, but later became more ideologically divided, although the generation remained widely committed to keystone values such as gender equality, racial equality, and environmental stewardship.

1954-1965: Generation Jones was the generation of children in the 1960s, who came of age in the middle to late 1970s and early 1980s. The election of Barack Obama to the U.S. Presidency created significantly increased awareness of this generation as many prominent sources referred to Obama as specifically a member of Generation Jones.

1965-1979: Generation X is the generation connected to the pop culture of the 1980s and 1990s they grew up in.^[2] Other names used interchangeably with Generation X are Reagan Generation, 13th Generation, and Baby Busters. Most of this generation are children of The Baby Boomers and The Silent Generation. Those born before 1973 spent most of their teen years in the 1980s.

1975-1986: The MTV Generation (arguably a subgeneration) are typically conceived as a "cusp" generation between Generation X and Generation Y that possess definable traits of both. While the music video and MTV rose to prominence during this generation's formative period, it is also notable for being the last generation able to compare hardwired and analog technologies to wireless and digital technologies based upon personal experiences. They are also the generation with the last personal memories of the Cold War era.

1980-1994: The Millennial Generation, or "Generation Y", is said to be dependent on digital technology. It is in this generation that mobile phones, PC's and portable entertainment devices became affordable and readily availiable when the Gen Yers were in their teens or early 20s. Millennials are generally a very socially liberal and politically active generation, voting in record numbers in the 2008 presidential election.

1995-present: Generation Z are modern children, born from somewhere in the second half of the 1990s to the present. In the early to mid 2010s, the yet-to-exist generation after this will be born.

Taurean Oxen

2009-05-26T19:57:00.000+10:00

Dual Signs
Ox and Taurus

One can always notice something heavy in your personality, and one would like to see you with certain note of lightness and spontaneity [i don’t laugh much]. But with your feet well planted on earth, you're a mountain of stability, obstinacy, and tenacity [my mother always tells me i’m too stubborn…] those are traits which most often prove to be qualities rather than drawbacks in your case. Whatever you want, you'll get it almost always surely, come hell or high water.

You perceive things slowly. You also ordinarily have much difficulty making decisions [oh the ice-cream story…]; but once your choice has been made, you will not come back over it, even though you're mistaken and know it.

You've a memory like an elephant and also, unfortunately, a grudge commensurate with your memory [ha-ha. oh yeah. one of my greatest vices]. Your attachment to earth, nature, and ecology is extremely profound and solid. You're also very much attached to possessions [shower me with presents and money thankyouverymuch. if i spend money on you, it probably means i love you], to matter, to all that's concrete and useful. It's difficult to find someone as sensual and sybaritic as you are.

On the sentimental plane, you value your spouse, home, and children as if they were your own possessions. You're very uncompromising, primary, and your sentimental attachments become ineradicable for you hate the transitory and the uncertain [make plans! lots of plans. i love plans].

The most interesting MDG2 post

2009-05-26T18:35:00.001+10:00

Remember that internet reality show Malaysian Dreamgirl? Well, second season wasn’t that interesting, I never finished watching it. But I was browsing through the blogs on the website and the most interesting thing I’ve read about it has to be this!

Elaine Daly wants a PA

Ever wanted to be inside the entertainment industry or among the inner circles of who’s who in Malaysia? Maybe here’s your chance.

Elaine Daly, our dear host and judge of Malaysian Dreamgirl, is looking for a Personal Assistant to help her juggle her busy schedule.

.

As her PA, among other things you’ll have to:
Schedule appointments
Liaise with clients and agencies
Attend meetings and events
Help manage her career

.

Candidates should be/have:
Below 30 years of age
Own car
Able to work independently
Good communication and writing ability

Fresh grads are encouraged to apply.

Interested candidates should send your cv to admin@malaysiandreamgirl.tv with the subject “Elaine Daly’s PA”.

So why is this interesting?

Because of the number one comment right beneath it!

pinkythegayboy Says:
May 19th, 2009 at 11:17 am

i would love to apply i have high experience in fashion..

i have watched gossip girls,confession of shopaholic and devil wears prada before so i know very well how this industry work and i also i have play alot of Manager games such as ea f1 manager, and fifa manager

below 30 - yup
own car i have - i drive a mercedes
Able to work independently - i am used to be independent because i dont have any friends besides my persian cat moohyuk

Good communication and writing ability - i communicate with people well some may say i am social inept but deep down actually i have very good communication skills. About writing , mom used to say that i am talented thats why i have doctors handwritingsa (or do u mean writing as in ability of writing a wall of text, its ok nowadays its easy to plagrise with the help of google)

LOL! I love!

These are pretty funny too.

Timmak Says:
May 19th, 2009 at 9:18 pm

I want be her PA even if the pay is Low……

so how do we apply?

Sally Says:
May 19th, 2009 at 9:43 pm

Awwww…poor Timmak! It’s a wonder how he’s even got a job right now! Hahaaaaaahahahahaa!

Sue Lin Says:
May 19th, 2009 at 10:35 pm

Timmak! Never read properly, fail! HAHAHA, go back to British Council! Hahahah

Timmak Says:
May 20th, 2009 at 12:25 am

Sue lin…only read part of the comment…hahaha!! will go back to british council than england optical for my eye check..

Sally…job i have, money not bad, but never had a hot boss like Elaine Daly. .hahaha!!

*grin*

Feeling It

2009-05-21T21:45:00.001+10:00

Ah, I totally remember why I loved Tae Kwan Do in highschool. Body Combat is bringing back memories. I totally enjoyed whopping ass today, though my arms are now totally sore. And enjoyed visualising the punches even more. Hurhur.

Now if only she would turn down the music so I don’t come out of the class half-deaf. There’s that muted ringing in my ears that will usually only come after a night out clubbing…

OMFG ha-ha!!!

2009-05-17T16:56:00.000+10:00

This is hilarious! Must watch!

There is a limit to patience

2009-05-16T16:50:00.001+10:00

… as you can see. ^-^

Beware! Even the most innocent looking creature has a cap on how much bullshit (s)he can take.

I just can’t decide…

2009-05-15T23:31:00.001+10:00

… whether it is hilariously pathetic or pathetically hilarious?

Either way, I am laughing my ribs sore.

More than one way

2009-05-10T20:06:00.001+10:00

Yes, there is more than one way to fry a fish.

To Babble

2009-05-10T01:55:00.000+10:00

Snippet from Wikipedia.

Now it was Nimrod who excited them to such an affront and contempt of God. He was the grandson of Ham, the son of Noah, a bold man, and of great strength of hand. He persuaded them not to ascribe it to God, as if it were through his means they were happy, but to believe that it was their own courage which procured that happiness. He also gradually changed the government into tyranny, seeing no other way of turning men from the fear of God, but to bring them into a constant dependence on his power... Now the multitude were very ready to follow the determination of Nimrod, and to esteem it a piece of cowardice to submit to God; and they built a tower, neither sparing any pains, nor being in any degree negligent about the work: and, by reason of the multitude of hands employed in it, it grew very high, sooner than any one could expect; but the thickness of it was so great, and it was so strongly built, that thereby its great height seemed, upon the view, to be less than it really was. It was built of burnt brick, cemented together with mortar, made of bitumen, that it might not be liable to admit water. When God saw that they acted so madly, he did not resolve to destroy them utterly, since they were not grown wiser by the destruction of the former sinners [in the Flood]; but he caused a tumult among them, by producing in them diverse languages, and causing that, through the multitude of those languages, they should not be able to understand one another. The place wherein they built the tower is now called Babylon, because of the confusion of that language which they readily understood before; for the Hebrews mean by the word Babel, confusion...

And thus did the Tower of Babel come to pass.

9 Therefore is the name of it called Babel; because the LORD did there confound the language of all the earth: and from thence did the LORD scatter them abroad upon the face of all the earth [From here].